so im really broken up about this Timid thing. my gf, she doesnt know what she wants to be to me anymore. Its got me all broken up.
but i dont miss work. i prolly should, though. for the past 3 days, they've given me 34 stops. all 3 other drivers combined have had 28. and i've gotten off early both days. why? how?
because i've not stopped moving in 3 days. i've unloaded 28000 lbs of steel in the past 3 days, and i've seen a forklift or overhead crane 4 times. i get to a stop, i wait for someone to help me out or act like they're gonna. if they don't move, i unstrap shit and push and toss. anything less than 500 lbs gets tossed. 500+ gets pushed. my arms are fucking sore. my whole fucking body is sore.
im not tired, though. even though i bitch about it in the mornings when i see that they've anally fucked me again, i still work like my life depends on it, because i know if i slow down i'll just get sad. can't be sad if you are lifting hundreds of pounds of steel by yourself 500 yards down a dirt road where no one would find you if, say, 300 lbs fell off the truck wrong, hit a tire, and landed on my leg...
but, fuck, im sore. but, fuck, i want to lift something more. when i was 19, i once absolutely trashed my parents house. threw an easyboy 20 yards into the yard. through the window. stuff like that. it was fun. one time thing. trashing things is definitely no fun when you are poor and not dependent on moms and pops.
why wont someone let me fucking download one of those early black sabbath albums!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?!!?!?!??! fuck. fuck fuck fuck fuck.... tool is getting old. i require sabbath bloody sabbath!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
and now the sun has set. i've been wathing it through my window, overlooking downtown atlanta and the park beside my house. the leaves are dead. now i can see these things. its exceedingly beautiful from my back porch. but the back porch sucks now. fuck im confused.
i th ink maybe tommorow i'll ask for a raise. i need to triple my salary or start to settle down. this being sore shit fucking sucks.
but i dont miss work. i prolly should, though. for the past 3 days, they've given me 34 stops. all 3 other drivers combined have had 28. and i've gotten off early both days. why? how?
because i've not stopped moving in 3 days. i've unloaded 28000 lbs of steel in the past 3 days, and i've seen a forklift or overhead crane 4 times. i get to a stop, i wait for someone to help me out or act like they're gonna. if they don't move, i unstrap shit and push and toss. anything less than 500 lbs gets tossed. 500+ gets pushed. my arms are fucking sore. my whole fucking body is sore.
im not tired, though. even though i bitch about it in the mornings when i see that they've anally fucked me again, i still work like my life depends on it, because i know if i slow down i'll just get sad. can't be sad if you are lifting hundreds of pounds of steel by yourself 500 yards down a dirt road where no one would find you if, say, 300 lbs fell off the truck wrong, hit a tire, and landed on my leg...
but, fuck, im sore. but, fuck, i want to lift something more. when i was 19, i once absolutely trashed my parents house. threw an easyboy 20 yards into the yard. through the window. stuff like that. it was fun. one time thing. trashing things is definitely no fun when you are poor and not dependent on moms and pops.
why wont someone let me fucking download one of those early black sabbath albums!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?!!?!?!??! fuck. fuck fuck fuck fuck.... tool is getting old. i require sabbath bloody sabbath!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
and now the sun has set. i've been wathing it through my window, overlooking downtown atlanta and the park beside my house. the leaves are dead. now i can see these things. its exceedingly beautiful from my back porch. but the back porch sucks now. fuck im confused.
i th ink maybe tommorow i'll ask for a raise. i need to triple my salary or start to settle down. this being sore shit fucking sucks.
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My roommate has all the Ozzy era Sabbath albums. I used to before I hocked my CD collection a few years ago.
That's kind of creepy that you ended your comment with "be good". The last email I got from Daniel before he died ended with "stay good". Do go overdosing on heroin now.
When I can afford it I'm going to have "stay good" tattooed on me.
My definitive relationship crash-and-burned in 2000, I know how much love and lust are a bitch personally. I'm sure it's got the brain kicking around in your pan, but if you're both not receptive to being together, then it's best to work with that than cut off all ties. It sounds like it got messy, though. I'd give her space. Good luck with that.
[Edited on Dec 01, 2004 6:08PM]