aoife

"This mind this body and this voice cannot be stifled by your deviant ways, so don't forget what I told you, don't come around, I got my own hell to raise."-Fiona Apple.

So Valentine's Day is quickly approaching. I hate Valentine's Day. Last year, I got dumped over Valentine's Day, and if I make it to this Valentine's Day without having sex, (which is rather likely), it will be a year since I have had sex.

I guess it's not for lack of options. It's just for lack of decent options. It's because that last person, dumping over Valentine's Day aside, was utterly amazing in lots of different ways, and it's hard to come down from that, to settle for someone that doesn't make my heart beat faster and my hands shake just by being close to me, someone that doesn't lend me books and read my writing and kiss the right places and talk about things that matter.

People like that don't come along every day. And yet, mostly, I'm happy alone. I needed to make this move alone, to step away from people who affected my decision-making and to figure out what I want, for me.

And yet right now, what I want is someone to curl up next to and watch a movie, kiss, and go to sleep.

I miss you, Colin. You're an asshole, but I miss you. Can I send the next boy I fall for down to take lessons from you?