amymay

Ummm so i'm back in Calif. The plain was ok got to see the episode of miami CSI with the suicide girls. It was very hot and i think the guy sitting next to me got a charge out of my drooling.

I'm back in reality again. The dog didn't have one accedent while i was gone but managed to pee three times inside again. (i think he hates me and he's doing it make me mad)

I also came home to the JOY of student loans... its a really long story but lets just say i completey broke down and will be looking for a job very very very hard.

Im happy to be back and i realized how nice it was to be comeing back to E. when i saw him at the airport holding a thing of Mt. Dew insted of flowers and wendy's on the car seat (jetblue doesn't offer food even on a 7 hour flight) Wendy's + Mt. Dew= Heaven

ummm i don't know what else i'm half very very happy and yet this cloud of meloncoly blues seems to hang over head. I've had a smile on most of the day but there is this feeling of tightness in my chest and my throught is on fire... the feeling when im trying to choke back tears.

I don't get it i just want to be happy. Or at least satisfide... why can't i find even that?