AAAAAARRGGHH I am so SICK of feeling shit. Fuck everything, fuck everything, give me my personality back!!!!
Today is a typical day in Cromer: cold, windy, my hands are numb. It's Sunday and I think I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today - am in one of those moods where I just want to be left alone.
I made a definite decision recently that when I go back to Chch, I'm going to seek out a counsellor. There is a lot of stuff in my past, some of it really disturbing actually but I won't go into that now, which seems to be catching up on me - some of it even happened like 3 years ago, and I sort of just wanted it all to go away so didn't really deal with it properly at the time, and now it seems to be coming to the surface - kind of like deep-buried shrapnel which just pops out of your skin one fine day, having left its comfy home in your kidneys/liver/adipose tissue an unspecified length of time ago in order to seek out the light at the surface (eeeuuw!).
Up and down, up and down - welcome to The Swingset (aka Angie's Moods)!!
Am missing my friends a lot, esp. Geni, Jemma and Soph. I need the company of smart, strong, funny women to get me back on track.
xoxox
Today is a typical day in Cromer: cold, windy, my hands are numb. It's Sunday and I think I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today - am in one of those moods where I just want to be left alone.
I made a definite decision recently that when I go back to Chch, I'm going to seek out a counsellor. There is a lot of stuff in my past, some of it really disturbing actually but I won't go into that now, which seems to be catching up on me - some of it even happened like 3 years ago, and I sort of just wanted it all to go away so didn't really deal with it properly at the time, and now it seems to be coming to the surface - kind of like deep-buried shrapnel which just pops out of your skin one fine day, having left its comfy home in your kidneys/liver/adipose tissue an unspecified length of time ago in order to seek out the light at the surface (eeeuuw!).
Up and down, up and down - welcome to The Swingset (aka Angie's Moods)!!
Am missing my friends a lot, esp. Geni, Jemma and Soph. I need the company of smart, strong, funny women to get me back on track.
xoxox
It really is awful being at the mercy of your moods, I'll also get you to get in touch with my doctor she is really great, holistic and won't put you on drugs right away. I'll going to be a great crutch next year, I know I've been a bit distant in the past, but I really feel so much better now, I really think I'm getting past the anxiety attacks and can control them now.
I love you very much.
P.S Fatality commented on your blog.. she is SG Superstar.
P.P.S Have you seen Twwly's baby? Yes I am such a SG geek.