alyssum

I've heard now from 3 different people this weekend, talking about how difficult it is to get other people to accept invites to "do stuff'. Something totally non-specific like "Hey, I'm available to hang out tonight. Wanna do something?" or something like a good friend inviiting you to an important event, like a birthday or something. If it's an "I'm busy, sorry" response, I can understand that. If it's an "I don't feel like driving that far" or "I don't really feel like going out", seriously...WTF? Especially if it's someone the rejecter normally goes out of their way to hang out with.
There's a part of me that thinks this is a kind of a social self-absorption, they just don't think about how their answer will affect other people. But it seems to be far too prevalent to be explained just by that. I can only think of a small handful of people who don't fall into this category, that I know personally. And clearly this is not just something I'm dealing with. At least in one case it's also someone who's very good about reciprocating in this sort of situation so it's not that people are doing unto others as has been done to them.

Are you guys aware of this phenomenon? If so, how have you dealt with it? Have you successfully gotten specific individuals to quit doing it? If so, how?