allyetnone

Well, all that frustration has seemed to go away! It took quite a while to evaluate myself and my situation. In the end, I made it out the dark hole and into the bright shiny world.

I stopped focusing on the negatives, I am already aware they exist. So, I thought of all the positives in my life. I have a kickass daughter who just got into the advanced training of karate as a 7 year old. She still has adult levels but, is doing awesome! She likes to show off her muscles to me by flexing. She enjoys working out! She does push ups with her fists on hardwood floors! She is such a badass, that now she wants to do parkour! I couldn't be happier.

I have been trying to think in positives and been surrounding myself with positive people who cherish my time and friendship. The results have been amazing. I hear compliments that are genuine from people. I tell people positives and mean them. And no one at work stresses me out anymore! I feel like a whole person. That has never been the case before. I would like to find an amazing woman to share my happiness with now. But, I can wait as rushing into trying would fuck up all I have worked on.

I got a promotion at work! I have done delivery, draught cleaning and installing, warehouse, merchandising and now...salesman of wine! Which will lead to me selling beer. I brew beer and love speaking in detail about brewing and different beer styles. I have to wear a suit since I am covered in tattoos. The owner of our company is a Marine who likes clean cut and sharp dressed sales force. So, no more shorts and short sleeve shirts. Good thing I was a funeral director before to be accustomed to this. It also means longer days for me, more money, and more responsibility.

The last week and a half I have woken up from the nightmare my ex-wife put me through. I have made ito ut in 3 and a half months of self-loathing and depression. I have learned to cope and realise I can't control another human, nor would I want to. I feel like i have evolved quite a bit and the universe is conspiring to my success. It sure did NOT feel that way just a short time ago having everything ripped from me.

I see a lot of my friends on here are struggling through stuff like I have in the past. I am here for you all and am pulling for you. Be you and be proud of you. Know you are awesome and special like everyone else. It is too bad most people sabotage themselves and ruin it for us. But, don't wallow in it. Or worry about it. In the end, karma rewards us all for our good and bad. So be good. It works out better that way.

Thank you all who read this. It means a lot to have someone take the time to read what I feel. That is why I read all the blogs I see posted on my feed. I may not respond to all but, some do not need my words as others have summed up my opnion or feelings better than I ever could but know, I care for all your words. You are all awesome kickass humans!

Thanks again