Fucking hell.
I hate everything right now. Life is shit today. I am tired and I have a headache and I am quite painfully aware of how far behind I fell in school because I was fucking sick. Nothing is working out. At all. I just checked my midterm grades and I'm flunking Comm. The rest have yet to be determined. I have no money to pay for school. They want $1, 068. I have $700 in my bank account and a scholarship for $350 (which I am probably going to lose after this semester). However, when I looked for the form I needed to fill out and turn in to get my money, I couldn't find it. I remember quite clearly putting it in my desk drawer, but it's not fucking there. If it's not paid by the 26th, Collection starts. I couldn't fucking buy a toothbrush if I needed it right now.
Then there's the fact that I have nowhere to live next year. I have to live off campus so that I have an address for things to be sent to so that I'm not charged out of state tuition because my insane mother decided to move to a hippie town in Michigan. But i have no one to live with. Everyone that I planned on living with has fallen through. At first Dave and I were going to live together, but then we broke up. By the time we started hanging out again, he had already signed a lease on another place. I was then going to live with Sunny, but I can't stand her anymore. My friend Rachel and I then talked about living together, but she decided a few days ago that she couldn't stand living with her mom for one more second and went out and signed a lease to live with her friend from high school. So I have no one to live with. At all. And I can't afford and don't want to live alone. I'm fucking afraid of the dark, I can't live alone.
At this point it looks like giving up and going back to Michigan is the easiest thing to do. It may end up being the only thing I can do because when fall rolls around I will be way behind in school and homeless. Or not even in school if I can't pay for it.
It's great how Financial Aid won't help me out enough to cover the huge fucking gap between the money I have and what I need to pay. They seem to think I can pay it. I don't see how they can even remotely think that.
I may as well go back to Michigan and work at a fucking truck stop for the rest of my fucking life. It's not as though I have any real friends here anyway.
I've always felt like I could always figure something out and things would work out. Well, this isn't going to work out. I'm totally fucked and the only thing to do, short of dying, is to go rot in Michigan.
I hate everyone and everything right now.
I hate everything right now. Life is shit today. I am tired and I have a headache and I am quite painfully aware of how far behind I fell in school because I was fucking sick. Nothing is working out. At all. I just checked my midterm grades and I'm flunking Comm. The rest have yet to be determined. I have no money to pay for school. They want $1, 068. I have $700 in my bank account and a scholarship for $350 (which I am probably going to lose after this semester). However, when I looked for the form I needed to fill out and turn in to get my money, I couldn't find it. I remember quite clearly putting it in my desk drawer, but it's not fucking there. If it's not paid by the 26th, Collection starts. I couldn't fucking buy a toothbrush if I needed it right now.
Then there's the fact that I have nowhere to live next year. I have to live off campus so that I have an address for things to be sent to so that I'm not charged out of state tuition because my insane mother decided to move to a hippie town in Michigan. But i have no one to live with. Everyone that I planned on living with has fallen through. At first Dave and I were going to live together, but then we broke up. By the time we started hanging out again, he had already signed a lease on another place. I was then going to live with Sunny, but I can't stand her anymore. My friend Rachel and I then talked about living together, but she decided a few days ago that she couldn't stand living with her mom for one more second and went out and signed a lease to live with her friend from high school. So I have no one to live with. At all. And I can't afford and don't want to live alone. I'm fucking afraid of the dark, I can't live alone.
At this point it looks like giving up and going back to Michigan is the easiest thing to do. It may end up being the only thing I can do because when fall rolls around I will be way behind in school and homeless. Or not even in school if I can't pay for it.
It's great how Financial Aid won't help me out enough to cover the huge fucking gap between the money I have and what I need to pay. They seem to think I can pay it. I don't see how they can even remotely think that.
I may as well go back to Michigan and work at a fucking truck stop for the rest of my fucking life. It's not as though I have any real friends here anyway.
I've always felt like I could always figure something out and things would work out. Well, this isn't going to work out. I'm totally fucked and the only thing to do, short of dying, is to go rot in Michigan.
I hate everyone and everything right now.
*Bubbles*
i hope that you figure something out. if i can help, let me know.