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aksiokersa

Member Since 2004

Followers 52 Following 81

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Sunday Apr 10, 2005

Apr 10, 2005
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It's my journal smile (if you already read the intro about interstitial cystitis, check out today's thoughts underneath the row of pretty pretty stars)
I thought it would be cool to document teh life of a chick who's got the girlie-disease "interstitial cystitis."
A lotta people don't know what I.C. is so here goes: incurable tiny ulcers inside the wall of your bladder make it hard to walk, exercise, eat, drink, fuck, dance, breathe, smell flowers, blah blah blah.
The thing is? I have this disease and i'm still kickin' ass.
And other for-real chicks that have bullshit going on with their bodies can relate.
No matter what our mutherfucking misogynistic doctors, sadistic nurses, well-meaning family members, and uninformed aquaintances say, we are awesome, and we can do a good job of taking care of ourselves, thankyouverymuch.
***************************************************************************************************************************

Bonus of being too sick to work?
No taxes! Yay.

I just finished reading this month's issue of Outside magazine.

There's a great article in there about a group of girls going rock climbing. One of my best friends from college ( - okay, she was a little more than a friend for a while. heh.) is an awesome rock climber. She climbs 5.11s and chews up boy-climbers and spits them out like they were sunflower seeds. It was really cool to read about a group of independent, adrenaline junkies like her, out there makin' it happen for themselves.

But mostly I'm just really depressed because I can't do shit with this broken body.

At heart, I'm one of those alterna-jock girls. I love skating ramps, riding bikes down rocky slopes, triathalons, aikido, waterskiing....

All impossible now thanks to ulcers.

Sometimes, facts are just facts and the fact is that I'm missing out. And I'm pouting about it right now.

One thing I've learned though, from being sick, that I NEVER would have learned in my former jock-life is that sometimes it's okay to pout. Sometimes you just gotta sit there and feel the bummer. You learn things about yourself, your attitudes, your weaknesses, when you can't run from the bad feelings.

And then, you come out on the other side a little bit better. A little bit stronger. Living a little bit easier with yourself and your shortcomings.

Sure I'd learn a ton if I was out there - but I'm learning a ton in here too. And that is okay in its own way.


Girlie Guitar Shows: I saw Melissa Ferrick Sat, and no offense, but she just wasn't my cup of tea. She was definitely on too much speed or crank, for one, and her songs are to hodge-podge for my tastes.
Garrison Star, on the other hand, rocked my world complete-like. If you like Neko Case, you will probably dig her.

Politics: Buh-Bye, Tom DeLay! Buy-to-the-bye.
VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
taoshen:
I am digging it. The pun and the fact you are into animals.

And my real people friends are camera shy. wink

And yes, break ups do suck, however staying friends is definitely something ou have to work for.

[Edited on Apr 11, 2005 11:45PM]
Apr 11, 2005
gilby:
I need to go climbing.
Apr 11, 2005

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