abashima

Do you enjoy beautiful, brutal, gorgeous, intense, dreamy, real, fantastic action in a well-executed movie? Then may I recommend Ballerina, which has the best cinematography, simplest touching sometimes heart-wrenching story around efficient choreography with shots that are actual art.

And also a message that, no, this is not, in fact, an overreaction. You deserve it—and more.

Do you enjoy low budget horror that competently conveys its simple story? Then may I recommend Bone Cold, which had just enough of just enough to keep my interest. There was something about it. It’s not a great movie or a hidden gem or anything like that, it’s…just enough, I guess?

Do you enjoy movies that understand you’ve been using too much of your brain to brain things? Then may I recommend Sharktopus vs Whalewolf, which, well, do I need to describe it? No I do not, because it’s just what it says on the tin. Still, it’s not bad—for it—and on the high end of low budget.

Do you enjoy big budget remakes of mediocre originals—neither of which turned out good? Then may I recommend Wages of Fear (2024), a movie about tension that lacks tension. Worse, there were no characters, only actors reading a perfunctory script. A much better (cliched) ending than original though, but that’s really not saying much.

After seeing Wages of Fear (1953), Sorcerer, and Wages of Fear...
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Do you enjoy movies that make you wait forever and ever for tension then end ridiculously terribly? Then may I recommend Wages of Fear (1953), which has an egregiously too-long first half that crawls, a tense overacted second half, but it ends with such inexplicable silliness that it practically undoes the whole movie, making the whole experience not worth the time spent.

Do you enjoy movies that don’t know what to do with themselves? Then may I recommend The Forgotten, which has an interesting premise well obscured by a thick catalog of cliches ably protecting the viewer from what could have been a good film.

Do you enjoy great action movies that put as much effort into supporting characters as the main character, so a whole entertaining story fills out? Then may I recommend Beekeeper, with great choreography and characters, good world building, and all around great work.

Do you enjoy movies that can take a subject you have negative zero interest in and still make you watch the whole film? Then may I recommend Whiplash, which is quite well written, with just enough dialogue and not a word wasted. I hate jazz and I don’t even know whether drum has one m or two—but I know this was a great film. Great...
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Episodes 1–7: Fab!

Episode 8 (finale): Uhm.

The problem was it didn’t explain the things it brought up—far too many things left unexplained—and then introduced brand new things—including things that were so…what th’…that they were frustrating to the point of being nonsense.

The final minute in particular was the most inexplicable.

I understand setting up for another season—but that’s what the intro of new things...
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I left my work backpack on the table and Sir Percival Softpaws moved right in.