_catalyst_

OMG THIS IS TOO FUNNY !!!!! 1. 3 and 5 really get me.

> > TOP 7 Idiots of 2006
> > The very last sentence is frightening and just might explain why the
> > world is in the mess it is.
> >
> >
> > Number One Idiot of 2006
> >
> > I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the
> > poison control center. Today, this woman called in very upset because
> > she caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her
> > that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her
> > daughter into the hospital. She calmed down and at the end of the
> > conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant
> > poison to eat in order to kill the ants. I told her that she better
> > bring her daughter into the emergency room right away.
> >
> > Here's your sign, lady. Wear it with pride.
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > Number Two Idiot of 2006
> >
> > Early this year, some Boeing employees on the airfield decided to steal
> > a life raft from one of the 747s. They were successful in getting it
> > out of the plane and home. Shortly after they took it for a float on the
> > river, they noticed a Coast Guard helicopter coming towards them.
> > It turned out that the chopper was homing in on the emergency locator
> > beacon that activated when the raft was inflated. They are no longer
> > employed at Boeing.
> >
> > Here's your sign, guys. Don't get it wet; the paint might run.
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > Number Three Idiot of 2006
> >
> > A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the
> > Branch and wrote "this iz a stikkup. Put all your muny in this bag."
> > While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began
> > to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the
> > police before he reached the teller's window. So he left the Bank of
> > America and crossed the street to the Wells Fargo Bank.
> >
> > After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the
> > Wells Fargo teller. S he read it and, surmising from his spelling errors
> > that he wasn't the brightest light in the harbor, told him that she
> > could not accept his stickup note because it was written on a Bank of
> America
> > deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo
> > deposit slip or go back to Bank of America. Looking somewhat
> > defeated, the man said, "OK" and left. He was arrested a few minutes
> later,
> > as he was waiting in line back at Bank of America.
> >
> > Don't bother with this guy's sign. He probably couldn't read it anyway.
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > Number Four Idiot of 2006
> >
> > A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that
> > measured his speed using radar and photographed his car. He later
> > received in the mail a ticket for $40 and a photo of his car.
> > Instead of payment, he sent the police department a photograph of $40.
> Several
> > days later, he received a letter from the police that cont ained another
> > picture, this time of handcuffs. He immediately mailed in his $40.
> >
> > Smartass... but you still get a sign
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > Number Five Idiot of 2006
> >
> > A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded
> > all of the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in
> > a bag, the robber saw a bottle of Scotch that he wanted behind the
> > counter on the shelf. He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well,
> but
> > the cashier refused and said, "Because I don't believe you are over
> > 21." The robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to give it to him
> > because she didn't believe him. At this point, the robber took his
> > driver's license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The
> > clerk looked it over and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and she
> > put the Scotch in the bag. The robber then ran from the store with his
> > loot.
> > The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and
> > address of the robber that she got off the license. They arrested the
> robber
> > two hours later.
> >
> > This guy definitely needs a sign.
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > Idiot Number Six of 2006
> >
> > A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop nervously waving
> > revolvers. The first one shouted, "Nobody move!" When his partner
> > moved, the startled first bandit shot him.
> >
> > This guy doesn't even deserve a sign
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > Idiot Number Seven of 2006
> >
> > Arkansas: Seems this guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided
> > that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab
> > some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over
> > his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back knocking him
> > unconscious.
> >
> > It seems the liquor store window was made of Plexi-Glass. The whole
> > event was caught on videotape.
> > Yep, here's your sign
> >
> > (Please note that all of the above people are allowed to vote)

AND THEY PROBABLY HAVE DRIVERS LICENSES TOO!!!!