superflea

My dog passed away on Friday.

I drove up to see her, because she hasn't been well for some time, and the outlook had been grim for a number of weeks. In fact, it had been a few months since the first time I'd heard the phrase "she could go at any time".

Unfortunately, she died at around 2 in the morning, and I didn't find out until I got home at around 9 in the evening. I wish I could have seen her one more time, and I had been idly considering heading up the night before, but at least I understand enough about these things to know not to beat myself up over it.

She died with my parents and my other dog at her side, in what my mother assures me was a gentle death. She'll be cremated and buried in the garden where she liked to sit, which I think is a very nice way to go.

My brother was home for the weekend, so at least the whole family got to be together. There had been times during the dog's illness that I wondered if I could legitimately invoke an illness in the family to request time off from work. It seemed like a grey area then, but I can say with certainty now that there was a death in the family.

In a weird coincidence, I found out that we had lost her in the same place that I found out we had first gotten her - walking in my front door, standing just as stunned both times as I received the news. Originally, I was stopping off for a quick dinner before heading back up to the University for my evening classes. This time, it was walking in after creeping into the driveway with the headlights off in the hopes of not getting her all excited aat my arrival, which could have been bad news for her heart.

The first time I saw those giant floppy ears attached to that little tiny beagle, I was convinced that there was no family on the planet less equipped than we were to take care of a dog. As it turns out, she was actually one of the best things that ever happened to us. I have years of fond memories and a lot of love to look back on.

That oughtta get me through the next little while.

I miss my dog a lot.