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I'm working on being a better me....

3 weeks ago today I almost made the decision to take my own life. I never felt so hurt, confused, or afraid in my life. It's gonna take a great effort on my behalf to make the needed changes, but at least I'll be breathing doing it. Feels good to get it out in the open, thats all...
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blu:
haha yess
lalka:
You're soooo nice, I wish I had friends like u
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blk_dynamite:
First off, I am bawling my eyes out at Hello Kitty rage. Secondly, I'm not much of a city fellow...but NYC in that pic looks serene as a mother*%&#?`! I'd love to go outside and smack a few balls (or cans) down the street like a boss too, lol.

As for the ex gf & bestie ordeal, rise above. Try not to react in the heat of anger, as that is exactly how one can throw their entire future away. Living with regrets is inevitable, seeing as how a part of you wanted to introduce his face to your foot, but never followed through; nevertheless, patience leads to rational thinking, and in my opinion you made the right decision to not come at him like a spider monkey.
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I made it through my first week of living in my new condo on my own. After years of living with mom growing up, then moving in with friends at college, I finally have my own place. (of coarse i'm renting lol) I was living outside of Philly for the past 4 years and loved every moment of it, but it was time for me...
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mutantbaby1:
Congrats man! I miss having my own place. Hopefully that all changes this year.
blk_dynamite:
Fingers crossed that you get the job, dude! I remember going through the same thing a year ago when I was still fresh outta school, trying to land job interviews after the application process. It took a minute to hit that stride with successful precision, but eventually I found a place to work that's kept me happy for 365+ days. You'll have good news soon enough.

And that's what having your own place is about! When I get mine later this year, I'm going commando. (TMI, lol)

Best of luck though, bro. Look forward to hearing more later on
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I took a few weeks leave to collect myself. Sometimes in life we get dealt a crazy hand of cards, but its up to us to control the outcome. Honestly I wasn't sure if I was gonna let my 1 month run out or extend it....

So I was playing on Youtube and found this video. I must say its pretty inspiring and well laid...
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lalka:
Haha I'll scream bubbles for you
adrastea:
Thank you very much. smile
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Well after some crazy road conditions my best friend and I finailly made it to our destination. Tempature is nice and cool with a winter mix in the air....

So were now all checked in and awaiting his two cousins arrival. Which is cool news to me that one of the two cousins is a girl. From what I hear she is a pretty good...
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soleilradieux:
Of course. biggrin
Oh neat! I love them!
Thank you for showing them to me. biggrin
jaxy:
Mom knows, she's struggling just as much. It just sucks that her birthday is going to go unnoticed outside of the uttering of "happy birthday."
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jaxy:
My friend is like 5 hours or so outside of Philly.
jaxy:
I think it would be too far away for her to travel sadly. :/
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jaxy:
I use to get all "I'm so sorry" and such about break ups. I really do feel for people whom have had their heart broken and or their feelings hurt but after my last break-up... I've gotten very cold towards these things.

I see the damage this last heartbreak did to me. While my story is different from others... I'm finding it hard to feel for others. Truly I don't want to see someone else in my current situation.
totem:
That's awesome!
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coyotemike:
Thanks for the advice. I've got a pretty good handle on what I can do and what I need to do. I can't stand soda of any sort (except for the odd organic ginger beer); I don't do canned food, so sodium becomes less of an issue, and I don't really add any to food. Raw veggies aren't too expensive (2 for $1 Green Peppers). Up until last summer, I was doing an hour/day on an elliptical at the YMCA, but when I moved, I let my membership expire. There is a walking trail here, takes roughly 45-50 minutes to the end and back.

I don't really do fast food, OTC meds (other than aspirin), or chemicals, although I do have an occasional cigarette (like 3-4/month) when I get stressed, but I am pretty sure I can stop that completely. I do need to cut down on bread, but I've already cut down a bunch because there's a bakery here that is pretty expensive, so I try to make things stretch out longer.

Mostly, I just need to keep after myself. Thanks for the support.
jaxy:
Thanks.
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Not much on my mind today so i'll share a video I watched on youtube today. So hope you and enjoy it like I did and have a great weekend!

Arrested Drunk Guy Sings Queens Bohemian Rhapsody



btw.... If you get pulled over for a DUI, you should get 1 chance to beat Rainbow Road on Mario Kart without falling off. If you can, you're...
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coyopakya:
50s today and for the next few days. sun almost everday. It is dope here. this is my first season here so i havent got to check out all the mtns, but once the end of march comes about i should have funds enough to get some day passes. I work at a smaller mtn and go to school here so cash is tight. BUT still very dope!

What board you getting. and get off that east coast, im from NH
tie:
heyhey, yes I did! and I absolutely loved it. I was worried first because it's quiet short for me height but it turned out to be just right.

how was your season so far? lots of snow days?