They offered me a million bucks.
All I want's a steady fuck.
Oh steady, steady, where are you?
Channer surf a sea of static,
see the prize but you can't have it.
There's something thankless in a wish fulfilled.
I am thrilled and bored.
I am unskilled, adored.
All of both and none of one.
I would kill for more.
I haven't killed before.
I...
Read More
All I want's a steady fuck.
Oh steady, steady, where are you?
Channer surf a sea of static,
see the prize but you can't have it.
There's something thankless in a wish fulfilled.
I am thrilled and bored.
I am unskilled, adored.
All of both and none of one.
I would kill for more.
I haven't killed before.
I...
Read More
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
radiofrank:
?
radiofrank:
It's not my place to ask...but you know how to reach me if you feel like venting.
Today was okay. I saw a lot of old friends. I also saw a really good play.
And to top off the night... Edmonton's famous improv soap opera... DIE-NASTY. With special guest Malcolm fucking Reynolds. Yup. That's right. Nathan Filion. Who was hilarious.
Unfortunately my feet are sore from walking home and tomorrow is another day at work.
In other news... no one really cares.
And to top off the night... Edmonton's famous improv soap opera... DIE-NASTY. With special guest Malcolm fucking Reynolds. Yup. That's right. Nathan Filion. Who was hilarious.
Unfortunately my feet are sore from walking home and tomorrow is another day at work.
In other news... no one really cares.
VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
velocity:
People stopped playing with me because I'm a bad winner, and I always win. You should come here so I can kick your ass at cribbage! But to dull the sting of losing horribly and repeatedly, I'd cook.
scopitone:
You need to watch Kiss Kiss Bang Bang until the majest of the Kilmer impregnates your male ass!
I wish you could meet my girlfriend
My girlfriend who lives in Canada
She couldn't be sweeter
I wish you could meet her
My girlfriend who lives in Canada
Her name is Alberta
She lives in Vancouver
She cooks like my mother
And sucks like a Hoover
I e-mail her every single day
Just to make sure that everything's okay
It's a pity she lives...
Read More
My girlfriend who lives in Canada
She couldn't be sweeter
I wish you could meet her
My girlfriend who lives in Canada
Her name is Alberta
She lives in Vancouver
She cooks like my mother
And sucks like a Hoover
I e-mail her every single day
Just to make sure that everything's okay
It's a pity she lives...
Read More
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
beaky:
you probably have a pinched nerve or something... if this keeps up, seek professional help
radiofrank:
That doesn't sound too good, FP. A trip to the doctor might be in order.
I know I should
Just go home
I know I should
Today I was told: I'm a good worker
I look like Sean Lennon
I believe the first one. I'm unsure about the second. I think it means I need a haircut because I look like a hippy.
I'm not terribly happy at the moment. Mostly indifferent. I'm getting by on video games and tiny...
Read More
Just go home
I know I should
Today I was told: I'm a good worker
I look like Sean Lennon
I believe the first one. I'm unsure about the second. I think it means I need a haircut because I look like a hippy.
I'm not terribly happy at the moment. Mostly indifferent. I'm getting by on video games and tiny...
Read More
VIEW 21 of 21 COMMENTS
velocity:
That is indeed a good skill, and very useful in my kitchen. Really, the only person who samples my cooking on a regular basis is my sister, and she's both very competitive and a better cook than me (impossible to believe, I know). She generally says, "Mine was better," to which I reply, "Please sleep on the lawn tonight."
soleils:
I suppose. Althought I never seen my dad rough up anybody, apparently he did when he was a little kid, but my grand-mother would beat him when he got home so he stopped. I've seen him throw my brother outside though when he was a teenager because he was beiing too mouthy, and I have seen him lift heavy objects with ease but that's about it.
A few leftovers from Ask a FreakPirate:
unravled: Now, what's the best lube (other than my blood) for fisting?
The tears of newborns. Sweet, sweet, sobbing lubrication.
thefreak: 1. Have you lived in Canada-Eh your whole life?
Yep. Almost 23 years now.
2. How did your family come to live in Canada?
My mom's family has been here for something like eight or...
Read More
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
beaky:
I guess I have to get used to it
If only I could walk a straight line, I'd make it home free
And everybody in this bar thinks they know me
And my story like "poor me" (yea, pour me another homie)
I can count the days til you come back
Or I can follow them sunrays down to the traintracks
I can stumble drunk over hope and love
Or I could keep drinkin...
Read More
And everybody in this bar thinks they know me
And my story like "poor me" (yea, pour me another homie)
I can count the days til you come back
Or I can follow them sunrays down to the traintracks
I can stumble drunk over hope and love
Or I could keep drinkin...
Read More
VIEW 21 of 21 COMMENTS
slannyfaced:
so, I guess I know who one of the memeber s was that complained about my comments....
hollypill:
Surely reality is everything that is not around us, everything we do not see? Like if you look at something which is yellow, really it is every colour but yellow. Surely reality is the same?
This is a .44 caliber love letter straight from my heart
Sometimes I don't know what to do with myself.
I'm sweaty, exhausted and sore. And trust me... I didn't have ANY fun getting this way. God... I fucking wish.
Sleeping alone is one of the shittiest things ever and I really hate having to do it.
And since this is a shitty entry devoid...
Read More
Sometimes I don't know what to do with myself.
I'm sweaty, exhausted and sore. And trust me... I didn't have ANY fun getting this way. God... I fucking wish.
Sleeping alone is one of the shittiest things ever and I really hate having to do it.
And since this is a shitty entry devoid...
Read More
VIEW 18 of 18 COMMENTS
margot_dent:
question: who would you murder given the chance?
and answer to my question: i am actually biscut the dog in that picture. that's right. i refused to ever do it again, it was terrible.
and as for the medicine, they also added an antihistimine for the night time version, thinking it would cancel out the affects of the sudafed. they were wrong. idiots.
and answer to my question: i am actually biscut the dog in that picture. that's right. i refused to ever do it again, it was terrible.
and as for the medicine, they also added an antihistimine for the night time version, thinking it would cancel out the affects of the sudafed. they were wrong. idiots.
oryon:
ask you anything? okay
what, pray tell, is a Big Turk? I mean obviously it's a candy bar but what is it made of?
what, pray tell, is a Big Turk? I mean obviously it's a candy bar but what is it made of?
So this is how it is without you
You are the tap that's reaching me
Volcano eyes that keep me warm
I turn for heat but I wake to no one there
Elliott - Carving Oswego
Work is going well still. It's a pretty relaxed job. I don't have much to do most of the day. I'm fairly bored between shows. You should all send...
Read More
You are the tap that's reaching me
Volcano eyes that keep me warm
I turn for heat but I wake to no one there
Elliott - Carving Oswego
Work is going well still. It's a pretty relaxed job. I don't have much to do most of the day. I'm fairly bored between shows. You should all send...
Read More
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
glass_cat:
I would email you.... but lets me honest; you know more than you likely would car to already.
You're in my house, you're in my clothes
And no one knows
You're in my head like a dumb song
And it just goes
You're on my face, you're on my lips
And it shows
I should be happy and I am
I want you close to me
You're like a simile, like totally
You're like a deep sleep to an insomniac
You're like the...
Read More
And no one knows
You're in my head like a dumb song
And it just goes
You're on my face, you're on my lips
And it shows
I should be happy and I am
I want you close to me
You're like a simile, like totally
You're like a deep sleep to an insomniac
You're like the...
Read More
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
mercedes:
look what i've got
and it shits candy!!
look what i've got
and it shits candy!!
malice:
We miss you too!! Well...I do anyway!! *pout*
It's been so long since I've been by myself
And I need this more than you will ever know
People like you and me never feel the breeze
People like you and me will never know the easy way
I scream into the wind and laugh
As the words slap me in the face
I would gladly trade a lifetime of convenience
For an honest...
Read More
And I need this more than you will ever know
People like you and me never feel the breeze
People like you and me will never know the easy way
I scream into the wind and laugh
As the words slap me in the face
I would gladly trade a lifetime of convenience
For an honest...
Read More
VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
charley:
Actually I think I may have to include a stop there, too many people I need to meet. I am such a Brit I presume that everything is a lot closer together than it actually is. Vancouver looks pretty close to Edmonton on a map, ha! I keep forgetting how large the country actually is. I think they call it island mentality! Montreal does indeed look beautiful, it's very obviously got that French influence architecturally, which I love.
zenfish:
you'd better appreciate it, prick. 
I'm back home. The original home. I start working here tomorrow. I'm quite excited.
The traditional "FreakPirate Goes Home" weigh-in just took place. I'm up to 120lbs which is the heaviest I've been since moving to Toronto in May of last year. That's up from a seriously frightening 108 at Christmas and a fairly unpleasant showing at 113 only a few weeks ago. Progress bitches!!...
Read More
The traditional "FreakPirate Goes Home" weigh-in just took place. I'm up to 120lbs which is the heaviest I've been since moving to Toronto in May of last year. That's up from a seriously frightening 108 at Christmas and a fairly unpleasant showing at 113 only a few weeks ago. Progress bitches!!...
Read More
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
dholokov:
Fort McMurray you say? I remember hearing that housing costs had undergone the most inflationary spiral of any city in Canada in the last little while, because of everybody coming in to work the oil sands. I also heard that even the lowest jobs pay something like $1,000,000 per hour, because everyone is so oil rich.
dallas:
oh shit. you weigh sooo much less than i do.!
I am now listening to one of the most beautiful albums ever recorded: Christie Front Drive's Stereo Sound. I also have Mineral's The Power of Failing. So much goodness.
It's a terribly dull day so far and it's raining. It just feels so... appropriate. I'm just in one of those moods where I want to sit in bed and read. If I could...
Read More
It's a terribly dull day so far and it's raining. It just feels so... appropriate. I'm just in one of those moods where I want to sit in bed and read. If I could...
Read More
VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
radiofrank:
Fair enough. I'd Purolate everything to you, but it would probably spoil before you get it.
tangus:
if you beg hard enough, maybe I'll put an extra podcast in next week, or put another song in next week's episode.