zumbi22

see the thing is, i have only myself to blame.

i am a pretty easy fucking target sometimes.

it's either that, or complete isolation.

neither makes me happy.

so once again, i am at a lost as to what to do.

fuck it man, maybe it's just not my time to be happy.

seeing as how i can't even sort out my own emotions and desires, it's probably for the best.

given the chance, odds are i'd just end up pissing it away or fucking it up.

i really want to be past all of this. i really do...

i want to rewind to 2003. that was the last time i had any true sense of clarity and purpose. things were good back then.

now all i have is a heavy heart, a tired mind and a self-defeating outlook.

all i know right now is that i am pretty damn unhappy and i have no idea how to fix it.

being a target isn't so bad i guess...

at least i serve a purpose.