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zophael

Flint, MI

Hopeful Since 2007

Followers 130 Following 91

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Sunday Mar 21, 2010

Mar 21, 2010
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I got the new Suicide Girls DVD this week and it convinced me that I need to shoot another set. I'm always mulling it over, but in the end a couple factors usually prevent me from doing such.

Factor #1 = Time. It's hard for me to put aside even a couple hours to shoot a set, not to mention the couple hours neccessary to make me look presentable in a set. I'm usually sans make up and in some really gross, but otherwise comfy pajamas when I finally end my workday which is not what people want to see frome me.

Factor #2 = Photography. I would prefer to shoot a set myself so that I know it looks exactly how I want it to and I'm not showing off any parts of myself that I find unattractive. That said, I don't want to waste a photographer's time or money by bringing them to my house and then not having things looking exactly the way that I want them. Sucks being a perfectionist sometimes.

Factor #3 = Anxiety. Pretty much the only time I leave my house lately is for work. I find myself more and more anxious around people and I have to medicate myself appropriately just to go grocery shopping. I'm completely worried that if I had to go somewhere besides my house to shoot a set, I would have an anxiety attack and make a fool out of myself hyperventalating on the floor somewhere. Not the best first impression.

Now that I've let all of my set worries out of the bag, I'm going to have to find a way to work around them. I'm really digging my body since I put on a little weight and some more pronounced curves and I long to share them. We shall see....

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