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zoomusikgrl

dirty jersey

Hopeful Since 2006

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Tuesday May 12, 2009

May 12, 2009
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So last night gonzo77 pulls this book off the bookshelf and starts giggling. It was a scrapbook I had given him for his 26th birthday, after we had been dating for about 6 months and were still really excited about each other. (I was sorting through my huge heap of stuff from the storage unit, so I guess "memory lane" was the theme of the evening.)

It was really surreal to look at this book. I had essentially documented the first 6 months of our relationship. Poems, texts, photos, ticket stubs (we saw nick cave, interpol, the cruxshadows, and eddie izzard in six months. Holy awesome!) Etc etc. Even printed out a copy of our first email exchange, via friendster beta. I'd found his profile on there late one night, took one look at his taste in music and literature, and promptly decided that he needed to be a part of my life. How cute and creepy. wink

We were so young. So happy. How was dating so easy then? You met someone, fell in love, started dating, and it immediately made total sense. Obviously it wasn't his or my first relationship, so we'd been burned before. But when we met each other, nothing from our pasts seemed to matter. It was just like, "oh hai. Yr cool, I'm cool, let's be in love now!"

So then I look at us now. Six years later. I see him and I see six years of the craziest ups and downs. I see a face as familiar to me as my own. And I can't help but be amazed at how despite everything we've been through, we're still chewing each others ears off and laughing hysterically about life. I love that man to pieces.

Maybe we weren't meant to be lovers. But the 21 year old me who lurked him on facebook was right. We were meant to be in each others lives. He's my best friend and probably always will be.

People are sometimes surprised these days that were living together while no longer dating. Yeah, its a little weird on paper. But I know there is some other woman out there who is better suited for him. I know they will make each other as happy as we once were, if not more so. Until then, I'm just keeping an eye on him for her. wink

As for me? I just hope I don't forget what that simple, freewheeling feeling of love is like. Because its supposed to be that easy. I don't want to get caught up in any painful or confusing situations anymore.

Anyway, I think I'm ovulating, as that all got me all choked up suddenly. tongue
VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
jackskellington3:
You know what cheers me up when I'm feeling down about past relationships not working out, I punch a baby! I'm telling you, it picks me right up tongue tongue
May 18, 2009
jackskellington3:
stupid video I keep trying to post doesn't want to work!
May 18, 2009

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