zombienik_o

i believe i am going to spend the evening making friends with andy's xbox (till he gets home) and looking at some old photos... i may post one or two later if i get permission to do so by the other person in the pic. something in her pics on here made me remember that i had these shots. it reminds me of happy times and mischief! i do miss those times. quite a bit actually. funny how things can change so much in such a short period of time.

i remember back when i was new on here and i didn't really know anyone on here in real life and i used this blog to get my feelings out... you know, say stuff to get it off my chest or sort thru how i was feeling... good, bad, stupid... it didn't matter, because nobody really knew me. now i sometimes feel i need to sensor what i write because i know quite a few of you now and putting my feelings out there like that makes me more vulnerable than i'd like. perhaps that sounds wierd... but i suppose i don't really want to be judged one way or the other by my friends... at least not over certain issues. while i know those of you who actually do know me in real life would more than likely say that i should just say what i am thinking (and thats usually how i am) certain things right now would be kinda awkward or innapropriate i think. it could change friendships in a way that i'd not like, which i would prefer not to happen. not that what i think about is nasty or harmful... its just that things would be strained i think.

hmm.... well those are my unsensored thoughts right now. i've just been thinking about this kinda stuff for a little while now and needed to put it out there. does anyone else feel like this about what you write on here?

have a good night. sleep well when you get there.
love zn.xx

maybe none of this makes sense... but thats ok for now i guess.