King for a day, Fool for a lifetime
So, today is kind of like the first day of a new life. About 3 years ago, I moved back here (upstate NY) from LA to be with family during a crisis of sorts. The idea was to come back here for a while, maybe a year or two, help things out, and return back to LA. Then, it got down to at the end of the work contract I was on, I would move back. My contract ended friday, so this week originally would have been a preparation of moving back. I have always had issues with saying bye and leaving friends, so these 3 years here in NY, I minded my own buisness, lived a VERY quiet life, and other than co-workers, didn't meet anyone here.
About 3 months ago, I started realizing that living away from family, I've missed so much of my Niece and Nephew's growing up. When I first moved away from NY, my nephew had just been born, and my niece didn't come til 3 years later. The girl I had been in love with for like 10 years of my life was murdered a month before my nephew was born, and the 2 of us had finally become close, and were taking our time creating a real relationship. what was the rush, after being friends for so long? Funny how life works. She had always talked about us moving to Boston, so after her death, I chose a college in boston to go to, and got the fuck away from NY. Told myself I could never live here in NY again, it just wouldn't be the same.
And it isn't the same place I left 14 years ago. My sister is going through a really fucked up marriage, and my niece and nephew are the ones suffering the most. They're both 14 and 11, and the most uncomfortable years of growing up are coming for them. I love these two kids, as if they were mine, and they feel the same. They can talk to their uncle and say shit they can't to their folks or grandparents. I realized that I need and want to be here for them through the upcoming years and troubles they have ahead. So about a month or so ago, I officially decided I need to stay here in NY, for how long, I don't know..
So there it is. My "first" day of living in NY again. All my stuff is still rotting in storage in LA (I'll need to get back here...ugh) and now I need to like, start life again. Meet people, make friends, find the places to go and hang out, date (oh god..the rough one). It is a weird and bittersweet feeling, and I have mixed emotions on the whole situation. But, I have to do this. So that's it. Starting over again. Wish me luck!
So, today is kind of like the first day of a new life. About 3 years ago, I moved back here (upstate NY) from LA to be with family during a crisis of sorts. The idea was to come back here for a while, maybe a year or two, help things out, and return back to LA. Then, it got down to at the end of the work contract I was on, I would move back. My contract ended friday, so this week originally would have been a preparation of moving back. I have always had issues with saying bye and leaving friends, so these 3 years here in NY, I minded my own buisness, lived a VERY quiet life, and other than co-workers, didn't meet anyone here.
About 3 months ago, I started realizing that living away from family, I've missed so much of my Niece and Nephew's growing up. When I first moved away from NY, my nephew had just been born, and my niece didn't come til 3 years later. The girl I had been in love with for like 10 years of my life was murdered a month before my nephew was born, and the 2 of us had finally become close, and were taking our time creating a real relationship. what was the rush, after being friends for so long? Funny how life works. She had always talked about us moving to Boston, so after her death, I chose a college in boston to go to, and got the fuck away from NY. Told myself I could never live here in NY again, it just wouldn't be the same.
And it isn't the same place I left 14 years ago. My sister is going through a really fucked up marriage, and my niece and nephew are the ones suffering the most. They're both 14 and 11, and the most uncomfortable years of growing up are coming for them. I love these two kids, as if they were mine, and they feel the same. They can talk to their uncle and say shit they can't to their folks or grandparents. I realized that I need and want to be here for them through the upcoming years and troubles they have ahead. So about a month or so ago, I officially decided I need to stay here in NY, for how long, I don't know..
So there it is. My "first" day of living in NY again. All my stuff is still rotting in storage in LA (I'll need to get back here...ugh) and now I need to like, start life again. Meet people, make friends, find the places to go and hang out, date (oh god..the rough one). It is a weird and bittersweet feeling, and I have mixed emotions on the whole situation. But, I have to do this. So that's it. Starting over again. Wish me luck!