zombette

i drew the first one in about an hour at school because i was bored and i am fascinated by Vanessas face. the second one came about when i got home and started playing with it on photoshop.
pretty cool, hey? i like the colors. so even though i cant take credit, (i guess) i think its quite a work of art.
i love to draw. i may have mentioned in previous entries that i consider it therapy now. after going through as many therapists (the rapists haa) and psychologists and psychiatrists and self-help groups, i decided there really isnt anything wrong with me at all.
ive always been a bit cracked.
so is everyone else.
and one day i aspire to get myself off all the medication i am on (im on shit for depression and anxiety, currently) because i hate the fact that i NEED them. i dont fancy NEEDING anything. or anybody. i dont want any more crutches, thank you very much. im young and relatively healthy (although i REALLY dont want to know what my lungs look like after a 4 year 3 pack of camels a day habit) so why go to doctor after doctor who all insist that this is wrong with me and that is wrong with me? i dont want to be psychosomatic. i dont want every little sad episode to equal severe depression with possible suicidal tendencies.
people have bad days.
everybody has bad days.
and i challenge any one of you to live how ive lived and be a 'happy' person right now. i wouldnt even say im depressed. id say im a realist.