zaftigg

It's not a good day or a bad day. It's more like a good minute or a bad minute. One second I'll be self-assured and even allowed to listen to music that reminds me. The next I'll feel so fucking empty and alone...

But it's not a kind of empty where you want someone to fill it. It's not the type of loneliness that goes away when you're around people. It's the type of shit that lingers and makes you wonder if you'll ever feel like bothering again.

The best part is that I've lost the one person who I could really talk to when I was in pain. I even tried talking to him today because I'm not as strong as originally deemed. It's like trying to go back to your house after another family has moved in. I'm not welcome where I once belonged.

Maybe I'm being melodramatic. Point is, this is a neutral moment. I recognize that I want him. But I don't ache. For now.

cl0ck