Brain Food
It's late at night (or early in the morning) and I'm still packing at a slow pace, in preparation for the bedbug bombing to come. I have my Multiverse File up, tinkering with it like I always do when I need a distraction to keep me going during the day. I was finishing up a 4th edition GURPS write-up of a character I had played in my friend Russell's super-hero rpg campaign in high school*.
*- if you understood that sentence, you're a big fucking geek.
I don't miss the actual trappings of high school at all, prolly because it was when my health first went south. I have bad, scattered memories of my first hospitalizations during that time period. However, I miss my circle of friends from that time period, and miss the escapism we indulged in. I miss the creative circle we had. I miss spending hours talking about characters, plots, why such-and-such gaming system is superior, and stupid arguments about who would win in a super-hero fight. We were all creative. Now 80% of what we came up with was crap, like any creative ventures*. But some of it was gold. I deeply miss that kind of connection with a circle of folks.
*- ask Russell about my vacuum-cleaner elemental sometime. He loved my vacuum-cleaner elemental, in a way that he totally didn't.
My therapists (both Drug & Art) have expressed concern about the amount of time I've been spending alone. My Drug therapist suggested that I start going out by myself once a week or so. I am worried about being by myself when my health is still so poor, but I do really need to get out more. I am thinking maybe there could be some cheap/free art displays or lectures I could get to with the TARC 3 bus. I also really miss the Art Jams that my friend Stephen Hughes used to host, but he said organizing them was such a hassle that he couldn't handle it (I can see that, and think I'd have a similar problem if I tried to organize them myself).
I would really like to have a website again, to host all of my artsy crap. I don't think I can make the monthly fee until I figure out how my budget is going to be long-term though. I know the internet has moved on past websites onto instant-communication social networking, but I think there's still a place for slower, more meaningful content. At least as a niche thing. It'd be my own little hobby, not for profit but just something to point at.
