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yeshua

Odessa

Member Since 2006

Followers 594 Following 4793

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Monday Jul 02, 2007

Jul 2, 2007
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Crazy thing happened today. I learned that my 6th grade teacher died this pasted weekend. I was left with a sense of dumbfoundedness. This was one of the adults that helped shape my life to what it is today. Do I feel sad? I really didn't know her. The last day of sixth grade (18 years ago) was the last time I saw her. The only thing I can remember about her was
One day, about a month before school ended, we had our Friday afternoon spelling test. Up to this point I had never pasted one of her spelling tests. I have always been bad at spelling and just shut down after failing my third of fourth test of the year. I had no thoughts of ever passing one. Back to the story. Mrs. Dennis sent us to art class and asked me to stay behind. She told me that I had once again failed the spelling test and that it was obvious that I didn't try. I told her that I didn't like spelling test and never really tried at them. She was upset at this and then started asking me what I was planning for seventh grade(Jr. High).
Now for you that grew up with middle schools, here is how Texas splits up the grades. K-6th are elementary school grades, 7th-9th are Jr. High and 10th-12th is High School.
I told her that I wasn't sure of what I would be perusing and would just find out once I get there. She took this as me being a lazy ass that didn't even care if he fail a test and pushed the issue.
Mrs. Dennis: Are you going to be in Football next year?
Me: No. (head high cus I knew she was bulling me. Now I'm in Odessa, TXHome of Friday Night Lights in the late 80's. I might as well have said I was applying to be a communist.)
Mrs. Dennis: Are you going to be in Band?
Me: No. (At this time my Jr. High had the best Jr. High band in the state.)
Mrs. Dennis: Are you going to be in Choir? (I was the head of my elementary school Choir and the darling of the music faculty.)
Me: No.
Mrs. Dennis: What about art? (she didn't know that art was required for a HS diploma and many 9th graders get it out of the way in Jr. High so they don't have to do it in High school, so art was only offered to 8th and 9th grade. All she knew was that I had free rein i the elementry art class.)
Me: No!
Mrs. Dennis: (steam coming from her ears) Then you will be a nobody! All of your friends will do something and you will just be a looser!
Me: (Silent and standing straight up and starting to tear up.)
Mrs. Dennis: (Seeing her opportunity and going in for the kill) Looser and a friendless Nobody That is what you will be.

She went on to explain why, if I wasn't in at least one of these things I would be an outcast, for about 3 minutes. I felt like I was 10 inches tall and crying almost uncontrollably. I some how managed to stand straight up and keep eye contact, but I was dieing in side. She had this look of disgust and every word was coated in hate.

Not sure if I happy or not. I played football and was already signed up at the time of this wailing. In 8th grade I hurt my back and never played again. I was in band until 11th grade and was in AP art until I graduated. I don't think I did this because of her. I already had plans for most of it. But did she shape my drive?
ta2dmom:
I think she probably shaped it a little. Because surely, in the back of your mind, you would have those thoughts of "I just don't want to do this anymore" etc. and there was a little nagging voice inside that said "Okay fine, give up and be the loser I told you you would be" and so you probably stuck out a lot of things longer than you might have otherwise. Not that I know this to be true but it seems like it makes sense to me wink.
I'm sorry to hear she's gone. It's hard to hear no matter how much time and distance has passed between, that someone that had any impact on your life is no longer here.
I don't think you did those things because of her, but I think it was because of her that you didn't give up on things when you were bored, or tired of them.
xoxo
Jul 3, 2007
prussia:
I receibe the stamps today! im so fucking exited!
I promiss to send something back to u soon
Jul 3, 2007

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