xzombiex

well the drum kit sold and was picked up yesterday, 75 which i dont think was a bad price, although i mniss it already i was glad it was collected the same day as it sold


i am not myself at the moment and if honest i fucking hate most of my life, i am even allienating the good thing in my life, you know when you have hold of something and its slipping this is how it feels at the moment, i dont know how to change things in my life for the better or to get back what i once had. i am not me and i have no control over anything in my life my medication doesnt seem to work like the tablets i used to be on maybe it might be time to go back to them, but then i think that perhaps after the couple of years ive been on my medication i might have become imune to them all and nothing will help me now. before i moved to Lancashire i had a break down which shook the fuck out of me and tok me ages to get through and get better, but i wonder if i am heading for another i get extremely stressed at the drop of a hat, even at work i find myself in need to cry and getting fucked off and stressed. i am finding it very hard to deal with things in general daily life, i am burrying my head in the sand every chance i get i am taking a back seat when it comes to making decisions and if i am honest i am shrinking in to my shell and refusing to deal with anything, i dont know what the fuck is going on with me or how things will end up, i want to run away and hide but know i cant

the one good thing i know is i am in love and it feels good but can i keep hold of it who knows i hope so
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