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xviolentxbeautyx

BALTIMORE

Member Since 2004

Followers 59 Following 34

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Monday Oct 24, 2005

Oct 24, 2005
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Why bother being happy.
when someone always has to come along and crush your spirit.

BAH.


I started my new job.
Its cool. Im the secretary for HR at the hospital.
I even have my own office sorta-kina!

You have to walk in my office to get to the director of H.R.'s office.

i didnt get much done today. Im still waiting for my lon-in info. So that kep tme from doing some things. Fortunately for me, they decided to give me the project from hell. Thats what they call it. I have two computers. One at my desk that i cant log into yet. One behind me. Which is the work station to create ID badges. Which is my responsibility. So this project from hell happens to be .......

they are upgrading their security system. So people will have to have access to certain areas and their badges will allow them that access. As well as provide an source of Identification and employment. Just like when i was working at JHBMC. I just have to keep in mind Im in the middle of no where and their just getting caught up with technology. So anyway, We have to issue new badges out to every staff member in the hospital. So that was my job this afternoon. I had to create badges for everyone and activate their card numbers. Fun! Not really, cause I have to figure out which access to grant which department and their not all listed. Its a pain, but I kept at it at nice speed. I got 25 done in 2 hours. Created, entered correct data, printed, activated, punch etc.

other than that i did pretty much nothing except open mail and sort applications or resumes. Oh and answer the phone. Of coarse. I think once i get into the routine of things I'll be good to go. I like to keep busy and I hate being bored. At least i should have computer access soon and il be able to work on the rest of my projects.

It was pouring rain when i left work. I got home and dad told me to call my car company. OF coarse I didnt want to, but he made me. he's a pain. The lady put me on hold, my dad asked how i got a 5 digit extension when i only hit 4 keys. I think hes just out of his mind. I hit the right numbers and she answered and asked me to hold. Yet he insisted I was pulling his leg. that I didnt call the right number. Like i was just sitting on the phone pretending. So i actually just laughed at him. lol

I have until friday to make up for the 2 back payments. Unfortunately, my unemployment appeal was denied. So Im shit out of luck. I told her i could only afford to make one payment. She informed me that because my prior repo on the first year i had it, they wont work with me. So I told her oh well. Ill call her back friday.

So my dad insisted that if they wont work with me, let them take it. He can insure me on the other cars, then i could save my money to buy a new one. Just dont do something stupid and go take out a car loan..... especially at a apr of 24%. Which yeah its stupid and I know, but I was living with my mom at the time and her credit sucked and I had none. So I had to take what i could get. Im paying for it now. So i come upstairs to relax. My father calls me back downstairs and decides to tell me he has to reconcider what he said. So i thought he was going to apologize for blowing up on me about buying my car and how i should have consulted with him. NO! instead he tells me some shit that he doesnt know if he can get me insurance on teh other car cause its stil i his name. I have no idea what he fuckin meant by that, but whatever. Make things difficult all you want.

Im tired of him raining on my parade.

Im alone Im lost. I have no one but my family.
My friends dont even know who I am anymore.
they say theyll miss you, that theyll visit, that nothings going to change.
When in fact the minute i left, it was like i vanished off the face of the earth.
What happened to my friends?

Sure I talk to people every now and then.
People will leave me messages or comments.
trust me, I remember and keep that in mind.
The one person who has been talking to me on a daily constant lately, is far away.
Thats just my luck.

I'm depressed, but happy.
Im trying to be happy.
i see sunshine, blue skies, and pretty rainbows.
However, right above my head is a rain cloud
that keeps following me around where ever i go.
Just like in the cartoons.

So what is a girl to do?
tehpeanut:
honey....i think you need a new daddy and im in the same boat as you....you cant let him get you sad..you look so pretty happy and i dont like to see ppl sad....ill come over and kick his ass for you and you can have my insurace when i get a car again...hugs
Oct 24, 2005

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