A New View... (also posted on my myspace)
Twenty Five...
Twenty Five years and counting. Of course, if you'd prefer to get technical about it, then yes, as of this Thursday, April 6, 2006, I will begin living my Twenty-Sixth year of life.
At first, nothing comes to mind about this date.
At first, no inspiring thoughts.
At first, its just another day and another year.
One...
Two...
Three...
The clock ticks and I sit here. What am I thinking about? I begin to obsess over the fact that I have now lived a quarter century. I'm well aware that there are probably several hundreds of thousands of people dealing with the same issue at this very moment. But would you care to hear something amusing? I honestly don't care.
Not to sound harsh, but really...I simply do not give a damn. Do I care if 24, going on 25, year old Jing Chan in some unnamed country in Asia is unsure what to do with his life? No, why the hell should I?
Hold on. Do I really mean it the way you think I mean it?
Recently, the aforementioned "why the hell should I" statement seems to be the overall position I've taken in life. Sure I have the empathy required to understand the feelings of others. Also, I do feel compassion for those who have less than me and for those who suffer, etc.
But everything is relative; relative to one's self.
So I do what I can to make my life better, and to become a positive collection of gelatinous materials whose presence have the potential to affect those around me in order to form a resulting cascade of overall 'positivity'.
Perhaps, if I am a better person, I will...in theory...make Jing Chan's life a little better. Although, there's always that one person who has an inherent negativity to them, in effect, spoiling the whole chain, I can't worry about that person.
Let them live their lives that way...and whither away quickly like the cherry on a chain-smoker's cigarette; their life being sucked away quicker with every drag.
So what's my new philosophy?
...Fuck 'em.
Twenty Five...
Twenty Five years and counting. Of course, if you'd prefer to get technical about it, then yes, as of this Thursday, April 6, 2006, I will begin living my Twenty-Sixth year of life.
At first, nothing comes to mind about this date.
At first, no inspiring thoughts.
At first, its just another day and another year.
One...
Two...
Three...
The clock ticks and I sit here. What am I thinking about? I begin to obsess over the fact that I have now lived a quarter century. I'm well aware that there are probably several hundreds of thousands of people dealing with the same issue at this very moment. But would you care to hear something amusing? I honestly don't care.
Not to sound harsh, but really...I simply do not give a damn. Do I care if 24, going on 25, year old Jing Chan in some unnamed country in Asia is unsure what to do with his life? No, why the hell should I?
Hold on. Do I really mean it the way you think I mean it?
Recently, the aforementioned "why the hell should I" statement seems to be the overall position I've taken in life. Sure I have the empathy required to understand the feelings of others. Also, I do feel compassion for those who have less than me and for those who suffer, etc.
But everything is relative; relative to one's self.
So I do what I can to make my life better, and to become a positive collection of gelatinous materials whose presence have the potential to affect those around me in order to form a resulting cascade of overall 'positivity'.
Perhaps, if I am a better person, I will...in theory...make Jing Chan's life a little better. Although, there's always that one person who has an inherent negativity to them, in effect, spoiling the whole chain, I can't worry about that person.
Let them live their lives that way...and whither away quickly like the cherry on a chain-smoker's cigarette; their life being sucked away quicker with every drag.
So what's my new philosophy?
...Fuck 'em.
Yeah, you know what? I think probably 25 was the hardest year of getting older, and I'm 37 now.
That was actually the first year of realizing "Oh crap I'm getting older" not necessarily in a good sense.
That was when I noticed my 1/4 inch of a receding hairline which freaked me out.
It just took me by surprise.
The other two big ones, 30 and 35, I already kind of prepared for. So for most of 34 I was already in mind bracing for 35, which at the time seemed a very old age.
Even now I'm thinking in terms of 40 and gettting used to that.
Eh, but it really is just a number. If you're mentally, physically and emotionally in good shape, what difference does it make?