xsilentxninjax

6 more days of misery

shivering, shaking..
alone, thinking..
wanting, waiting..
weaping, hurting..


i feel as though i am alone in my feelings.
as if i am the only one that cares.
constantly wishing to know what you think, and how you feel.
i can't eat, can't sleep.
my heart feels heavy,
and it sinks into the pit of my gut.


shivering, shaking..
alone, thinking.....
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so i have actually updated my tattoo pictures in my folders/ all 4 of them are in there !!! ooooh watch out now. might be too many for you to look at in one sitting so take it slow.

not like it matters, but i put up a few new pictures.

some of my room after the storm. (long overdue, but fugit)

and some in my "pictures" folder.

i left work after 3 hours yesterday. i was bored and didnt feel like doing anything. i could have just stayed, and should have. i could have made money and not done anything.. instead i came home and did nothing and didnt make money. i could have went in today and made up the time. i didnt. i should have.

i guess i dont regret...
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i'd like to be off all the time and get paid for it.. that would be nice.

THRICE

"Send Me An Angel"

[Originally by Real Life]


Do you believe in heaven above
Do you believe in love
Don't tell me a lie
Don't be false or untrue
It all comes back to you


Open fire on my burning heart
I've never been lucky in love
My defences are down
A kiss or a frown
I can't survive on my own


If a...
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this is destroying my mind.
i cant take it..
everything out of control..
what do i believe !?
i dont know anymore.
i dont want to be here
i want to move on
i want to leave
everything
leave everything behind
where is the self destruct button ?
or has the countdown already begun.
i am tired of writhing in pain.
sitting alone and screaming...
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i think it's shit, but want opinions..

the simple thought of you use to carry me through the day.
now i can't wait to escape the day.
you aren't there to make everything better.
how do i stop the onslaught of feelings,
for the only thing, only person that made me feel alive ?
with no sorce of light present there can only be darkness....
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"i am so alone.."
"so utterly alone.."

i am lonely. i hate this.

time for adult swim.


yeah.. skull

my girlfriend of one year and almost seven months has broken up with me... she didnt really give me a reason. i thought we were going to get married. we talked about getting married. now she doesnt want to be with me ?

the same thing has happened twice before. exact same way. i dont fucking know. i havent really cried.. yet. dont know if...
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