Ran into my ex gf the other day, she had a beautiful 4 year old daughter and I could barely believe it, while I looked at her, all I could do was remember heated nights in freshmen year of highschool when we hid beneath her sheets making love... she was with an imaptient and unattractive man and had put on some weight... funny thing was she glowed like Id never seen her glow before
She must have been really happy, or at least faked it well... and I fumbled dumbly at the consession stand making it as awkward as I always seem to when all I wanted to do was jump into her arms, hold her and apologize for three years of neglect...
She lingered after her child and male companion to talk, small talk is all we could manage, but I knew she wanted things to go much deeper but like me, couldnt find the courage or words... her presence frightened me, I dont know why...
Also at work my boss who also happens to be two years older than me and one of the best friends for years, called me into his office to show me text messages from the mechanic, a pot head kid just about six months older than me, he has aparantly has a crush on me for quite some time, and now, when were closing decides to get Jamed invloved, knowing hes the meddling type.
So we talk for a while about it and then get into past sexual experiences weve had, I dont know how the conversation strayed so far from topic, but end of shift has arrived and someone knocks on the door, its Chris, the mechanic... needs his ot signed for, when he sees me he turns red and sits down, when james blurts out how he plans on making the situation uncomfie for us.... I being the complete bitch I am turn it around by blurting "so you stuck it in his ass, then what?..." Chris doesnt know James is gay, so James turns red and quickly opens the office door shoving him from the office and slams the door, looks at me with the widest eyes ive ever seen on him and his nose starts bleeding from the stress of it all, hes a HUGE closet case, only his closest friends know so I feel like shit... but thats what he gets for fucking with me
beside Im already in love, desperately, maybe the only reason I write these stupid entries, because I miss him so much and want him to know Im thinking about him...
Other news, going to bumbershoot 05' in Seattle, with a car load of great friends right after the bowl goes out of business with my big severence check
woohoo!!!
I get to see the NY DOLLS!!! IGGY POP AND THE STOOGES!!! FLOGGING MOLLY!!! DONNAS!!!! and GARBAGE!!! as well as soooo many more... Im so excited I need a change of pace after the car wreck... lost 15 lbs since on nerves alone, eh... almost as hot as I was in HS... something to be happy about? not so sure... I was a rageing bull dyke... good? bad? you decide.
I miss you S.D.L and our late night talks, hope life is treating you better than I could
She must have been really happy, or at least faked it well... and I fumbled dumbly at the consession stand making it as awkward as I always seem to when all I wanted to do was jump into her arms, hold her and apologize for three years of neglect...
She lingered after her child and male companion to talk, small talk is all we could manage, but I knew she wanted things to go much deeper but like me, couldnt find the courage or words... her presence frightened me, I dont know why...
Also at work my boss who also happens to be two years older than me and one of the best friends for years, called me into his office to show me text messages from the mechanic, a pot head kid just about six months older than me, he has aparantly has a crush on me for quite some time, and now, when were closing decides to get Jamed invloved, knowing hes the meddling type.
So we talk for a while about it and then get into past sexual experiences weve had, I dont know how the conversation strayed so far from topic, but end of shift has arrived and someone knocks on the door, its Chris, the mechanic... needs his ot signed for, when he sees me he turns red and sits down, when james blurts out how he plans on making the situation uncomfie for us.... I being the complete bitch I am turn it around by blurting "so you stuck it in his ass, then what?..." Chris doesnt know James is gay, so James turns red and quickly opens the office door shoving him from the office and slams the door, looks at me with the widest eyes ive ever seen on him and his nose starts bleeding from the stress of it all, hes a HUGE closet case, only his closest friends know so I feel like shit... but thats what he gets for fucking with me
beside Im already in love, desperately, maybe the only reason I write these stupid entries, because I miss him so much and want him to know Im thinking about him...
Other news, going to bumbershoot 05' in Seattle, with a car load of great friends right after the bowl goes out of business with my big severence check
woohoo!!!
I get to see the NY DOLLS!!! IGGY POP AND THE STOOGES!!! FLOGGING MOLLY!!! DONNAS!!!! and GARBAGE!!! as well as soooo many more... Im so excited I need a change of pace after the car wreck... lost 15 lbs since on nerves alone, eh... almost as hot as I was in HS... something to be happy about? not so sure... I was a rageing bull dyke... good? bad? you decide.
I miss you S.D.L and our late night talks, hope life is treating you better than I could
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this is my contribution to society. Now that i look back on it highschool really sucked.