xkonstantinex

okay so court yesterday sucked. we got there at 10am, and didnt leave till 3pm. i got 1 year supervised probation, random piss tests, 24 hours of community service, and 6 months suspended license. so after court i had to go sign up to get a piss test... come to find out they are making me wait 10 more days till i take it. i think this was the most upsetting of all, i stayed clean for a month for this test and i just wanted to get it over with, so i could smoke after i left court... but no... they had to take that away from me too. bastards. so after we finally left the courthouse, we went to the abc store, but with out luck it was closed, because they had a power outtage or some shit. so as a final option i did something that i told myself i wouldnt do anymore. i got a crazy bad headache by about 6, and spent the remainder of the night in incontrollable pain. i was so tired and wanted nothing more than to sleep, but sleep wasnt an option at the time. and then came the come down. which because i had the worst headache of my life was more miserable than normal. it wouldnt have been so bad if it was a constant feeling of sadness, but that up down bull shit was killin me. i'd be fine one second and something as small as the sound of the air conditioning kicking on would make me start crying. it sucked, and lucky me my best friend was stuck at work till close, an all i wanted in the world was for him to be there. gosh, that is the worst i have felt in a long long long time. oh yeah, and somewhere in the night i decided to call my ex, but he wasnt home, im kinda glad he wasnt cause that would have been weird... hey i havent talked to you in a year, im really fucked up, oh by the way i think im still in love with you. yeah that could have gone bad. anyways... im feeling a little better now. maybe i should call my ex, now that i can think clearly, cause its really obvious i want him back.

hope everyone is doing well.

<3