Hello SG world . How is everyone? I'm at a wicked crossroads. But I've already made a decision, and I'm 98.7% sure it's the wrong one. But idk. Here. I'll elaborate.
There's this lady. Funy how this is how all stories start. Ha. Anyways. She's a great woman. Fun to be around. Likes doing similar things. Wants to take care of me, which is something weird still to me, but.
The problem is, she wanted to get married and start making babies. She's 25, I'm 24. All of that business scares me. I stil feel like I'm young. I still feel like there's something I'm meant to do, or get to doing before I think about that stuff. And the more and more she would pressure me. And when I would tell her, she would get pissed and stop talking to me. Then she would come back, and want to be friends. recently she asked me what muy opinion was as to her getting a donor to have a kid, and I said, whoever you end up with shouldn't judge you by that. That shouldn't play into how you feel about someone. Her response was she couldn't do this anymore, and she never wanted to talk to me again.Then it was a fight. I told her I couldn't deal with the constant pressure to rush into something I wasn't exactly ready for. And I told her she'd be better off without me in her life, since all I do is give her false hope. I wasn't trying to lead her on, and I wasn't trying to string her along...
I feel empty. And I hate it. I'm my biggest enemy. I've learned that before you can be happy with someone, you must be happy with yourself. But I haven't been. In a long time. I'm afraid to fail. And I know, you can't fail unless you try. But I watched my parents fight and argue starting when I was 13 and ended in their divorce after I was 15. They shoved me in between them. Told me to pick. And I couldn't. How could I? I told myself I'd never get to that. So I'm overly reluctant to even let myself get that deep. Hell. I don't know anymore.
Was I wrong?
Anyways. Hope everyone is doing well. And I mean that people. Good day!
There's this lady. Funy how this is how all stories start. Ha. Anyways. She's a great woman. Fun to be around. Likes doing similar things. Wants to take care of me, which is something weird still to me, but.
The problem is, she wanted to get married and start making babies. She's 25, I'm 24. All of that business scares me. I stil feel like I'm young. I still feel like there's something I'm meant to do, or get to doing before I think about that stuff. And the more and more she would pressure me. And when I would tell her, she would get pissed and stop talking to me. Then she would come back, and want to be friends. recently she asked me what muy opinion was as to her getting a donor to have a kid, and I said, whoever you end up with shouldn't judge you by that. That shouldn't play into how you feel about someone. Her response was she couldn't do this anymore, and she never wanted to talk to me again.Then it was a fight. I told her I couldn't deal with the constant pressure to rush into something I wasn't exactly ready for. And I told her she'd be better off without me in her life, since all I do is give her false hope. I wasn't trying to lead her on, and I wasn't trying to string her along...
I feel empty. And I hate it. I'm my biggest enemy. I've learned that before you can be happy with someone, you must be happy with yourself. But I haven't been. In a long time. I'm afraid to fail. And I know, you can't fail unless you try. But I watched my parents fight and argue starting when I was 13 and ended in their divorce after I was 15. They shoved me in between them. Told me to pick. And I couldn't. How could I? I told myself I'd never get to that. So I'm overly reluctant to even let myself get that deep. Hell. I don't know anymore.
Was I wrong?
Anyways. Hope everyone is doing well. And I mean that people. Good day!
You were upfront with her & told her how you felt. That's all that should have mattered.