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Never Forget, Never Forgive

I've got these words carved into my chest now. I can't be sad anymore. All I've got is this hatred. I refuse to feel anymore. I'm going to settle down over the next few months and then go back to how it used to be.

My mom is finally leaving my dad next month. It's been far too long in the...
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4 out of 5 people will die

It's been a long couple of days. I can't give an exact amount becasue i know niether how long it has been nor what day it is right now. I've just kind of got that thing where friends aren't really friends. I've got nothing against my "friends" as people but i could never feel anything about any of...
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nspark:
It may be good for you just to be independent and if a good friend happens to stumble into your life then accept him/her but don't actively go searching for them for a while
nyghtwish:
Wow. Our journals are just about the exact opposite right now.

I guess it depends on how you look at it. I'm too afraid to lose everything.
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As the Fallout Vapor Settles

well, i guess its here now. Summer break between semesters is in full swing. "Friends" are home and the days have once again begun to blur together into a warped timeline that i don't care about. It's pretty easy now to just wake up, do stuff, and go to sleep and not have to feel much of anything in between....
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
dookiejones:
yeah....but how much do you want this?
fenchurch:
biggrin
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How Many Happy Endings Does It Take?

I haven't been up to a lot since my last entry. I'm home for summer now and there isn't a lot going on. I've been watching a lot of movies with a friend and just hanging out; thats about it. And of course, ive seen some very good ones and some very bad ones.

I think im really...
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fenchurch:
Yeahhh that's exactly what my room looked like until my roommate moved out and I couldn't take the EMPTINESS anymore.
xip:
Wow I didn't know I fucking inspired you... I've been in a really fucking rough patch this past month.. every day is some new horrible disaster I have to clean up... I'm confident I'll pull myself out of this.. once I move the fuck out of this place soon and buy myself a cat.

I've been writing a fuckload as well.

We should talk more often. How often DO we talk? Not often..

I'm happinessOplenty on AIM... remember it.. treasure it
xip
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With Steel in My Heart and Iron in My Soul

I dont really know what to update about these days. I'm not feeling particularly sad or angry anymore. I'm not really feeling much of anything.


VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
xip:
We should make lists of everything we've ever done and contrast and compare, I wonder how alike we are in our pasts
xip
blueleopard:
I like the job a lot. I was relieved to see that you are still alive. lol

Did you like the new Family Guy? I thought it was hilarious.

Are you on a break from school? What are you studying?
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Professed Intent over Real Intent

im really confused. im still angry at a lot of people and its getting easier and easier to just stay angry at them. I've broken two of my three promises as of last night, and i need to tell the person i promised......but i dont know if she really cares. I really want to believe that she does, but it's...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
tryst:
you know, we're playing in richmond tomorrow tuesday night, and it's 18+. you should come to that one. it's closer to you anyway. rockbot.net
blueleopard:
hey little brother. start by only making promises to yourself and once you start keeping those, then move on to other people. easier said than done, i know, but life is hard.

give me note if you have any advice questions, i'll do my best.

take care.
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I Can't Keep my Promises

This is the most fucked up thing ever. Ive told my entire story to someone over the past three days and its helped me expenentially while i was saying it all but right now im just angry. angry at everything and everyone. while i wasn't talking about it, ive been beyond depressed. there isn't a chance in hell that i...
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VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
linkismyhero:
I think apathy is worse than the difficult emotions. If I'm going through a period of apathy, there are so many things in life I miss out on that when I start to feel good, I have so much regret that I didn't do the things I could've done. I know if my depression gets better and I start to live a fuller life, I'll have a lot of regret to live with for all the years wasted in apathy.

Anyway, hmm, it looks like it might be a cryptoquiz. There are letter patterns in there. I tried one word and it didn't work with the rest of the puzzle, but I'll keep trying and see if I can figure it out smile
linkismyhero:
Well, I couldn't figure out the code you gave me on my own, so I tried this decoder program and it couldn't decipher it either. Maybe it's isn't a code after all confused
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White Feather Wings, Doused With Gasoline

a lot of stuff happened over the past two days that I am trying to deal with. I dont know if ill be able to. I can't write it all down, but it wouldn't help anyway. Ive stopped drinking and im going to take my medication everyday. Im not going to cut myself anymore. Ive made a promise, however...
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blueleopard:
Hey

Yeah, everything is better today, nice burn I got though.

Everyday is a struggle, but some recent events have helped to form a new opinion of her, I just want to get to the point of apathy.

What is your situation? I am much older so maybe you can learn from some of my fucked up past. Let me know.
simply2complex:
Hey thanks for your comment on my journal, n after reading your journal I think your right. I get exactly where your coming from.
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The Way I Get By

Well, i guess its time for an update. I've been so busy since whenever; haven't even been to sleep in a couple days. but it seems like there should be a nice little break coming this weekend. I have to make a decision as to which of the two parties my friends are throwing that I should attend. I could...
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xip:
Now we just have to force Tori Spelling to bare the child of Lil Jon and create the new messiah.
xip
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In reference to "Cleave"

this post is in reference to the previous journal entitled "cleave"
you know, "Matt and Mark's Bogus Journey"?

well, somebody saved a copy of the school newspaper for this week and found this entry under the "Police Beat" section:

"Mar. 20 --" At 5 a.m., Ofc. Joseph Stupidhead [name changed], while on foot patrol, saw a male lying on...
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sgdevotee:


EL SUICIDO LOCO
xip:
It'd be awesome if the 80s lingo combined with the modern lingo and something like "crunk stellar" was born.
xip