xanotherdeadhero

I Can't Keep my Promises

This is the most fucked up thing ever. Ive told my entire story to someone over the past three days and its helped me expenentially while i was saying it all but right now im just angry. angry at everything and everyone. while i wasn't talking about it, ive been beyond depressed. there isn't a chance in hell that i could even begin to start to write it down but i lost a lot today. It makes me feel better to lose it, but i didn't want to feel better this way.

ive been here before. this is what its like right before the apathy sets in. I spent the better part of 19 years without being able to feel a thing. Its coming back.

I had a conversation with someone yesterday and I remember her saying that she's empty. I asked her if she ever wasn't and she said no. and i said,

"If you dont have emotions, dont wish for them!"

I let myself fall into a lie
I let my walls come down
I let myself smile and feel alive
I let my walls come down
No matter how i try i don't know why
You push so far away
You wrapped your hands tight around my heart
And squeezed it full of pain
"With This Knife" by Smile Empty Soul

Retribution, from my hand! A bullet for every demon.
Only your blood can cleanse you of your sin. Your actions proved
that you value profit over others lifes.
Images of your mutilated victims as I line you in my sight.
The wrath of sanity unleashed. Justice on Judgement Night.
"Wrath of Sanity" by Earth Crisis