xanderknight

Anyone ever feel that when life can't get any more boring or annoying......it does........I feel as though I am trapped in a rut, and the hole is so deep that I can't get out of it. Almost every day its go to work, come home, eat, sleep. But today was different, I had to drive across town at 7 o'clock in the morning to drop my sister off to her Day Clinic, and had to rush over there to make sure she got on the bus.........no thank you or anything from that girl.........just a quick slam of the door.

Dealing with my brother is ok, because we rarely talk or see each other (awake that is)......but its my nephew that pisses me off the most, why the fuck should I have to take care of someone that is not my child! Its so depressing sometimes, I just feel like hiding somewhere and getting rid of all my identification and assuming a new identity..........I mean, I am blessed because I have my health, sane mind, and every now and then money in the pocket and gas in the tank. But somedays........somedays with my family its just not enough.......there aren't enough tears to make me feel better. My friends are my only refuge, and I have few of them. I actually said the other day, "Why am I so happy to be at work, oh yeah, because its an escape from home......"

One day I'm just going to drive out in the country and scream at the top of my lungs.........just to make sure that I am still alive, but of course.......I won't be heard. Everything lately is getting me down: customers, family, bills, etc, etc...........I know that is life, but there has got to be something better than this..........................