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wyoh

Member Since 2009

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Thursday Apr 23, 2009

Apr 23, 2009
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So today is just one of those days.

I got a call to tell me we're not going to be able to see the house this Sunday. The people who are renting the house aren't answering the phone when people are trying to set up us going to see it. I mean, I can understand, but it still sucks. The house has been for sale for like 3 years, and they are on a month by month lease. But no offense to them, I want that damn house! We were talking about going over to our friends and staking out the place to see when they're home. LOL!


And all in all, I've just been kind of tired and out of it today.


Hubby also called and said that he was going to our friend's place tonight to work in the blacksmith shop. Said he would stop at home. I thought there was a chance of us all being able to go over and hang out for a few hours. I guess not.

It turned into a tense situation again. I told him I felt like he got to go out whenever and I didn't have the chance to do that most of the time, because I'm home with the kids. He said it's not true...

But how can I go out? I don't have transportation except public trans; I don't have money, and I don't really have many friends...He has a truck and is the one who makes the money.

I love him, but sometimes he pisses me off so bad. No wonder we're separated. Things like this are some of the reasons I just don't feel like I can trust him. I understand that he wants to go "have a life", but it would be nice if he could at least pretend to give a shit about how I feel. I feel so stupid for even opening my mouth some days... And I'm sure he's over there doing his thing, working in the shop... but here I am upset... I just need to keep my mouth shut if I want everything to be ok. Yeah, he's my best friend as long as I don't let him know how I get jealous of him doing things... Last night he went out to see friends too. What did I do? NOTHING.

I did go out last Saturday, but going out costs money, and if you don't have any without having to ask for it... and he can say "yes" or "no"...


....Damn it's supposed to be my "happy" time off, and this is the second day I'm either stressed or ready to cry. Some days I just feel like running away.
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
mere:
frown I've been struggling with minor social anxiety for my whole life. It's really dependent on the situation for me. But I can only imagine what you're going through with all that! frown The best thing to do is just get out there and confront the anxieties.
Apr 23, 2009
tweedle:
I'm sorry about your bad day dear, and about your husband... you should go out and do something for yourself. Buy yourself a cute outfit or some ice cream. Maybe go to a spa, or something.

And say, fuck everything else smile
Apr 24, 2009

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