Not-so-new thought, but it's pertinent to my now. You don't always feel "sad" when you're depressed.
Partially through conscious effort, I'm keeping my moods mostly level. I'm keeping up with deadlines, going to work, doing stuff I'm supposed to do.
But when all I'm looking forward to is for it to be the weekend again, so I can sleep as much of the day as I want and can stay asleep for, and not have to do anything... that pretty much paints the picture.
I'm not even excited about the studio right now. Interested, yes, and I'm sure I'll learn things and so on tomorrow when I'm there. But not excited the same way I was. Or I just can't feel/access the excitement, at least.
Then I remember that this weekend I have to get up Saturday to take my mom to the airport, and then I have to clean my room, do piles and piles of laundry, scrub walls, dust, clean birdcage...
So much for getting to sleep and do nothing.
And so much for what I was looking forward to.
Yeah... I'm not really... "sad," and maybe not even really "depressed."
But... the joy has gone.
Partially through conscious effort, I'm keeping my moods mostly level. I'm keeping up with deadlines, going to work, doing stuff I'm supposed to do.
But when all I'm looking forward to is for it to be the weekend again, so I can sleep as much of the day as I want and can stay asleep for, and not have to do anything... that pretty much paints the picture.
I'm not even excited about the studio right now. Interested, yes, and I'm sure I'll learn things and so on tomorrow when I'm there. But not excited the same way I was. Or I just can't feel/access the excitement, at least.
Then I remember that this weekend I have to get up Saturday to take my mom to the airport, and then I have to clean my room, do piles and piles of laundry, scrub walls, dust, clean birdcage...
So much for getting to sleep and do nothing.
And so much for what I was looking forward to.
Yeah... I'm not really... "sad," and maybe not even really "depressed."
But... the joy has gone.
I hate having to get up and go when you know your body needs the sleep. And yes I understand the feeling you're describing. It's a shame we don't come with indicator lights so that others can see just how lousy you feel inside while putting on your best effort on the outside.
So what fun stuff for you then?