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wynnesome

Member Since 2005

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Tuesday Oct 11, 2005

Oct 10, 2005
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Uhhhh... just had kind of a major crash toward the end of my workout and on the way back after. I know the reasons, and knowing the causes as I do is what's going to keep me till tomorrow when I'll be fine again.
1. I'm very tired. I'm glad I went and did the workout in spite of the late hour and giving up the hour's sleep, but the tiredness makes things hit differently than they would otherwise.
2. My arms were really weak tonight. Again probably because I'm tired. I had to go a little lighter on my arm exercises, which makes me feel like a loser, to do less instead of staying the same or progressing each time.
3. I ate this big dinner tonight... I'm working out pretty hard, it got cold out, I didn't sleep much last night, and I needed the food, and it was good, healthy food, lots of protein, which I don't always need, but sometimes I do. But still I ate a lot at once and I feel bloated and gassy. That also will pass, and since I was very hungry, it's much better I ate what I did, than getting a bunch of junk food/sweets. For sure.
4. There's this one fat deposit in my butt that I want to go away! I'm sure it's actually shrinking slowly, but I'm impatient and I don't like it, especially when I sit in certain positions to stretch, which make me notice it more.
I know I'm doing the right things... I'm working out consistently for a month now, and I got my eating habits much more in line this week. I know very well that if I keep up both of those things, I will be in much better condition internally, and much happier with how I look externally, in not too much time.
Still, it's hard to be patient some days. I either want to say "screw it" and eat bunches of junk food because "who cares, I can't see the good habits making a difference anyway," or go overboard on the exercise and low-fat diet to the point of burnout on both, to try and hurry things along, which I know is no long-term solution at all. So I'm trying to keep myself from falling into either of those traps, and mostly I can keep reminding myself that what I'm doing is good and healthy, and I WILL see even further results from it than I already have seen in the past month, even though I was still eating pretty crappy for most of that month. But, there are moments like tonight where the "be patient, it will happen," is small consolation.
I know basically what's going to happen is I'm going to go to sleep right now, for about 4 hours. I'm going to wake up tired and hating it, I'm going to hate the cold outside, warming up my car, hate the long drive. But once I get to the studio and get into session, I'm going to feel fine and great and excited again. So... really, given that I'm going to sleep almost immediately here, I have about an hour and a half total time of feeling bad, before I get into session and feel good again. That's not so much, and I am really looking forward to session and learning a bunch more about mastering, and being in a much better mood, as I mostly have been lately, barring the last half hour or so.

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