wugglyump

he broke things off with me yesterday. i asked if he wanted to hang out.
he made me feel like i was beautiful. because...i don't seem to know how to feel that way on my own.

i know i don't need a mate or whatever to validate how i feel, or should feel. or how i should see myself. but...dang. i can't...luckily i burned my bridges with the guy i had broke things off with.

i guess i just don't like being alone. the way he would look at me. he thought i was beautiful. no one has ever looked at me like that. it was amazing. i felt like we were connecting more and more.

but he felt like a second choice. that's not fair to him. but...i was happy with him. even in a sour mood i'd slowly get out of it. I will find someone that accepts me for who i am on all counts... It seems like it's taking a really long time. I do think i am...pretty, i'm usually pleasant to be around. i just am very sad right now. Life can always be worse. I'd like a companion to share it with i guess. And I miss Dinh. I have a headache. I want to go to sleep.

I'm off tomorrow and maybe i will fix my hair tomorrow. i'm cold, and sad. and lame. I shouldn't be like this. Life can always be worse. And i'm lucky to have what i have. I know this.