I decided that taking a break from SG isn't a good idea after all. This is one of the few places that gives me a sense of belonging and helps me feel better.
I was in a very bad place when I posted my last two blogs. Thoughts about leaving SG came directly from that bad place.
There was a song by the Persuaders, recorded in 1974, titled A Thin Line Between Love and Hate. I thought of that song when contemplating my current feelings toward Mae-Ann. Hate is too strong a word. Hurt and disappointment come closer to my feelings toward her.
When we first met, I was in the best shape, both physically and emotionally, that I'd been in since my wife Annette passed away. Mae-Ann, on the other hand, was an emotional wreck due to the way her ex husband treated her for many years. I was there for her through thick and thin. Everyone who knew her noticed how happy she was since she began seeing me.
In the last few months, I've been going through Hell, what with my financial problems which led to anxiety and depression. She knew how much I was hurting. Yet, she picked this time to blindside me with her desire to end the relationship.
The irony was that one of the things that festered inside of her was the images of me with the person I was involved with before we began to get serious. Yet, I had chosen to let the physical aspect of the previous relationship go in favor of being with Mae-Ann. Her jealousy, for which there was no basis, ate at her over time. She would say terrible things about this other person, even though they had never met. Mae-Ann kept saying how this person didn't care about me and had somehow taken advantage of me. The truth was that I wouldn't have been capable of getting into a relationship with Mae-Ann or anyone if not for the positive influence of this other person.
Even more ironic is that it was Mae-Ann who abandoned me at the worst time possible. Yet, the person she spoke of so venomously continues to be there for me when I need to confide in someone or need some good advice or encouragement. This is true even though she's now living far away and has her share of complicated issues.
I'm slowly getting over the hurt that Mae-Ann has caused. I'm very lonely, a feeling I had for a long time after my wife's passing. It's a feeling I wasn't prepared to have to deal with at this time.
I was in a very bad place when I posted my last two blogs. Thoughts about leaving SG came directly from that bad place.
There was a song by the Persuaders, recorded in 1974, titled A Thin Line Between Love and Hate. I thought of that song when contemplating my current feelings toward Mae-Ann. Hate is too strong a word. Hurt and disappointment come closer to my feelings toward her.
When we first met, I was in the best shape, both physically and emotionally, that I'd been in since my wife Annette passed away. Mae-Ann, on the other hand, was an emotional wreck due to the way her ex husband treated her for many years. I was there for her through thick and thin. Everyone who knew her noticed how happy she was since she began seeing me.
In the last few months, I've been going through Hell, what with my financial problems which led to anxiety and depression. She knew how much I was hurting. Yet, she picked this time to blindside me with her desire to end the relationship.
The irony was that one of the things that festered inside of her was the images of me with the person I was involved with before we began to get serious. Yet, I had chosen to let the physical aspect of the previous relationship go in favor of being with Mae-Ann. Her jealousy, for which there was no basis, ate at her over time. She would say terrible things about this other person, even though they had never met. Mae-Ann kept saying how this person didn't care about me and had somehow taken advantage of me. The truth was that I wouldn't have been capable of getting into a relationship with Mae-Ann or anyone if not for the positive influence of this other person.
Even more ironic is that it was Mae-Ann who abandoned me at the worst time possible. Yet, the person she spoke of so venomously continues to be there for me when I need to confide in someone or need some good advice or encouragement. This is true even though she's now living far away and has her share of complicated issues.
I'm slowly getting over the hurt that Mae-Ann has caused. I'm very lonely, a feeling I had for a long time after my wife's passing. It's a feeling I wasn't prepared to have to deal with at this time.
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Sorry for the delayed response. I spaced on it.
So... go Sox?