You know what I like? Bailey's.
You know what else I like? Having windows in my car again. That is pretty cool, too.
Hello, people of SG. I'm sorry we haven't been talking much lately. I really don't have that much to say. It's not you, it's me. Seriously!
I'm sure a lot of folks around here must thing that Suicide Girls live really fun, interesting, sexy lives. The sexy part is probably true but the rest of it is sort of a crapshoot. I spend most of my time on the couch these days. HOORAY FOR THE IDIOT BOX. I do have roller derby practice three times a week and I suppose some people would find that interesting or fun. My family, by the way, are not "some people".
What can I tell you? Work is going well for me. My job isn't particularly satisfying but it's not very difficult and it pays well. I like the people I work with and the customers aren't too bad most of the time. Some of them are sort of crazy, though, and it's really hard to explain windows to crazy people. You start using phrases like "check rail" and "baked on finish" and "glazing" and they get really confused. And then you tell them their patio doors are going to cost $3500 and did you want that installed, WELL, that's probably going to be about $3000 more OH AND YOU WANTED FINISHING well, that is an extra three or four or FIVE hundred dollars. That is how you make crazy people angry. You tell them they cannot afford these wonderful things that they want. Wal-Mart was a lot like that but on a different level. At my new job I am working with homeowners who are bemoaning the cost of windows which TOTALLY makes sense and I can sympathize because a house needs windows and windows are expensive. At Wal-Mart I was working with people who lived in trailers and apartments and section 8 housing and were surprised and angry that they couldn't afford an HDTV and felt like they should yell at me because of it. MAYBE YOU SHOULD PUT THE HDTV MONEY TOWARD A MORTGAGE OR SOMETHING. Or you could buy your kids some, you know, decent food. Like some vegetables. I see they're smeared in chocolate, though, that might get in the way.
I have been very loopy lately, people of SG. Every time something went wrong at work this week we blamed daylight savings time and I don't think we were completely off base with that. My sleep schedule is all out of whack. Devilducky and I normally go to bed anywhere from 10:30 to 11:00 but this week it's been an hour later, obviously, so it makes it harder to get up for work. AND THEN WE ARE LOOPY WHEN WE GET THERE. We keep sending each other cracked out emails. It's really nice to be able to email your significant other at work, by the way. I'm sorry for anyone who gets jealous when they read this but MY BOYFRIEND SENDS ME LITTLE ASCII ART BUNNIES AND DAILY DINOSAUR COMICS IN THE EMAILS. Hooray. The Daily Dinosaur Comics are because I cannot look at the website any more (I got in trouble). I don't know what the ASCII art bunnies are for. They are just cute.
I made my first Sephora purchase - through their website, I'm too afraid to go into the store because I have such awful skin - and OH. MY. GOD. it came with samples of the stinkiest perfume ever. I hate perfume but I requested these samples specifically because I'm some kind of dumbass? Apparently? Something about the packaging made me think that these particular fragrances would be sort of light and nice but OH NO. They are just like every other perfume on the face of the earth. OVERPOWERING.
I did, however, purchase some Rosebud Salve. I have used it twice since I got it a few hours ago and so far I really like it. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO ORDER IT. It is fun to take beauty advice from strangers on the internets!
I decided I wanted to start wearing more skirts this summer and so far I've purchased two. One of these and one of these (I did throw away the stupid EllieMae Clampett rope belt, though). I have not had much luck finding similar, basic skirts. And I cannot order anything off of Old Navy's website because I am too tiny and the only place I can find my size in their skirts - for the most part - is in the store itself.
By the way, people who make fun of me for being skinny can SUCK IT. It's not like I'm being skinny to offend you or some shit. PLEASE STOP TELLING ME I NEED TO EAT MORE. I cannot eat more. I eat nearly constantly throughout the day. Big girls and Tiny girls need to band together and realize they are not different AT ALL. We all have trouble finding clothes that fit. We all suffer with those assumptions people make about us because of our respective sizes. WE ARE ALL SEXY AS HELL AND CERTAIN MOTHERFUCKERS JUST DONT KNOW HOW TO HANDLE IT.
I just finished reading David Sedaris' book "Dress Your Family in Courderoy and Denim". It was quite good. If you like David Sedaris you should pick up a copy. I got mine at Borders for six bucks! It was on the bargain table! JUST LIKE YOUR MOM. HA!
You know what else I like? Having windows in my car again. That is pretty cool, too.
Hello, people of SG. I'm sorry we haven't been talking much lately. I really don't have that much to say. It's not you, it's me. Seriously!
I'm sure a lot of folks around here must thing that Suicide Girls live really fun, interesting, sexy lives. The sexy part is probably true but the rest of it is sort of a crapshoot. I spend most of my time on the couch these days. HOORAY FOR THE IDIOT BOX. I do have roller derby practice three times a week and I suppose some people would find that interesting or fun. My family, by the way, are not "some people".
What can I tell you? Work is going well for me. My job isn't particularly satisfying but it's not very difficult and it pays well. I like the people I work with and the customers aren't too bad most of the time. Some of them are sort of crazy, though, and it's really hard to explain windows to crazy people. You start using phrases like "check rail" and "baked on finish" and "glazing" and they get really confused. And then you tell them their patio doors are going to cost $3500 and did you want that installed, WELL, that's probably going to be about $3000 more OH AND YOU WANTED FINISHING well, that is an extra three or four or FIVE hundred dollars. That is how you make crazy people angry. You tell them they cannot afford these wonderful things that they want. Wal-Mart was a lot like that but on a different level. At my new job I am working with homeowners who are bemoaning the cost of windows which TOTALLY makes sense and I can sympathize because a house needs windows and windows are expensive. At Wal-Mart I was working with people who lived in trailers and apartments and section 8 housing and were surprised and angry that they couldn't afford an HDTV and felt like they should yell at me because of it. MAYBE YOU SHOULD PUT THE HDTV MONEY TOWARD A MORTGAGE OR SOMETHING. Or you could buy your kids some, you know, decent food. Like some vegetables. I see they're smeared in chocolate, though, that might get in the way.
I have been very loopy lately, people of SG. Every time something went wrong at work this week we blamed daylight savings time and I don't think we were completely off base with that. My sleep schedule is all out of whack. Devilducky and I normally go to bed anywhere from 10:30 to 11:00 but this week it's been an hour later, obviously, so it makes it harder to get up for work. AND THEN WE ARE LOOPY WHEN WE GET THERE. We keep sending each other cracked out emails. It's really nice to be able to email your significant other at work, by the way. I'm sorry for anyone who gets jealous when they read this but MY BOYFRIEND SENDS ME LITTLE ASCII ART BUNNIES AND DAILY DINOSAUR COMICS IN THE EMAILS. Hooray. The Daily Dinosaur Comics are because I cannot look at the website any more (I got in trouble). I don't know what the ASCII art bunnies are for. They are just cute.
I made my first Sephora purchase - through their website, I'm too afraid to go into the store because I have such awful skin - and OH. MY. GOD. it came with samples of the stinkiest perfume ever. I hate perfume but I requested these samples specifically because I'm some kind of dumbass? Apparently? Something about the packaging made me think that these particular fragrances would be sort of light and nice but OH NO. They are just like every other perfume on the face of the earth. OVERPOWERING.
I did, however, purchase some Rosebud Salve. I have used it twice since I got it a few hours ago and so far I really like it. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO ORDER IT. It is fun to take beauty advice from strangers on the internets!
I decided I wanted to start wearing more skirts this summer and so far I've purchased two. One of these and one of these (I did throw away the stupid EllieMae Clampett rope belt, though). I have not had much luck finding similar, basic skirts. And I cannot order anything off of Old Navy's website because I am too tiny and the only place I can find my size in their skirts - for the most part - is in the store itself.
By the way, people who make fun of me for being skinny can SUCK IT. It's not like I'm being skinny to offend you or some shit. PLEASE STOP TELLING ME I NEED TO EAT MORE. I cannot eat more. I eat nearly constantly throughout the day. Big girls and Tiny girls need to band together and realize they are not different AT ALL. We all have trouble finding clothes that fit. We all suffer with those assumptions people make about us because of our respective sizes. WE ARE ALL SEXY AS HELL AND CERTAIN MOTHERFUCKERS JUST DONT KNOW HOW TO HANDLE IT.
I just finished reading David Sedaris' book "Dress Your Family in Courderoy and Denim". It was quite good. If you like David Sedaris you should pick up a copy. I got mine at Borders for six bucks! It was on the bargain table! JUST LIKE YOUR MOM. HA!
VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
lylonijade:
BUFFALO. did you get my message?
trevallion:
Done!