Went to Nickel City today after work and busted out on the Dance Maniax machine for about 45 minutes. Got as high as a 1393 combo and almost aced the entire set, but I flopped near the end of Happy Hopper. Normally I'd be upset, because that's my favorite song and I know it so well, but I was just so glad to break a thousand again that I didn't let it get to me.
Afterwards I headed home through rush hour traffic (and cursed my "brilliant" idea to swing by the arcade) and stopped to get a hairvut and do some grocery shopping. The haircut turned out alright, I suppose. Its not different enough. I'm sick this Princeton (as it is classically called) cut. Maybe after this grows out a bit I'll have something cooked up.
Not much else. Kind of a boring day. Thought about a few things. I'm really thankful that I keep a journal and keep it with me at all times. I was able to flip back through the past few weeks (though I'm ashamed to admit that I've hardly been writing at all this month) and get a bit of perspective, which is always nice.
I'm breathing a bit more calmly now, I would say. I've got a rocky path ahead of me. School. Work. Romance. They've all been weighing heavily on me in one way or another, but wailing about it hasn't gotten me anything but an awkward feeling around the people I love the most.
I'm afraid. I'm afraid that I've whistled this tune one too many times before and that it really is just air blowing through my lips with no soul behind it. I'm afraid that I'm not ready. I'm afraid that I am ready and my fears are holding me back.
But, I must not fear. Fear is the mind killer. Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has passed, I will turn the inner eye to see it's path. Where the fear has gone, there will be nothing. Only I will remain.