Well, this is three weeks without a drink, the longest I've ever gone when I could, and its going ok. Those of you who know me know that I was an effective, functioning alcoholic, and nearly every minute of my day when I wasn't drinking was thinking about drinking. AA is really helping a lot, everyone is very supportive, and hearing there stories, make me realize sometimes, that I didn't really have it all that bad, I'm lucky, unlike a lot of them, I haven't really lost anything or everything, some of them have lost everything and pulled themselves from the brink of hell to start recovering there lives. Seeing this is very beneficial, and helpful, my friends are also there for me, being supportive and not trying to pursued me to drink. Plus they love it because I always volunteer to be the D.D.
There is just one thing missing in my life, and she is both the biggest reason to stop, and the biggest reason to crawl back into the bottle. She claims that she is there for me, but she is not there in the way I want and need, even though I know that if she did take me back, it wouldn't be a good thing, it would be bad in so many ways, I want a clean break, but she is not only the epitome of everything I am looking for in a woman, but also one of my best friends. But it is so hard to not, drop to my knees and profess my love for everything she is and everything she represents, to not just try to kiss her, to hold her, to cry the way I only can in front of her, and beg for her to take me back, to tell her to pull her head out of her own ass and think that we could work, because I know what the outcome would be. But nice guys finish last, and I know it would be for the best, but sometimes your heart and head don't always agree. Hence the reason, whenever I need to talk to someone about relationships, I always ask my women friends, not the guys, cause the guys agree with my brain (cause we are guys and it is just logical), but the women generally agree with my foolish heart, and when I need the advice, that is what I want to hear, I know what the guys would say and that is what I don't want to hear. The addition of some new friends and getting better acquainted with some of the friends i allready have helps more than would ever be able to be put in words due to my lack of vocabulary skills and the ineffectiveness of words in general, those of you on that list should know who you are, and even though these are just words, know that I will be forever greatful for your help, support and friendship and I am forever in your debt.
And just in case you think I'm hanging up my glooves forever, I'll be back someday, but it'll be a while, so if you have stock in Miller, Jack Daniels, Guinness or Bass, you may consider selling
terporarily unwild bill
There is just one thing missing in my life, and she is both the biggest reason to stop, and the biggest reason to crawl back into the bottle. She claims that she is there for me, but she is not there in the way I want and need, even though I know that if she did take me back, it wouldn't be a good thing, it would be bad in so many ways, I want a clean break, but she is not only the epitome of everything I am looking for in a woman, but also one of my best friends. But it is so hard to not, drop to my knees and profess my love for everything she is and everything she represents, to not just try to kiss her, to hold her, to cry the way I only can in front of her, and beg for her to take me back, to tell her to pull her head out of her own ass and think that we could work, because I know what the outcome would be. But nice guys finish last, and I know it would be for the best, but sometimes your heart and head don't always agree. Hence the reason, whenever I need to talk to someone about relationships, I always ask my women friends, not the guys, cause the guys agree with my brain (cause we are guys and it is just logical), but the women generally agree with my foolish heart, and when I need the advice, that is what I want to hear, I know what the guys would say and that is what I don't want to hear. The addition of some new friends and getting better acquainted with some of the friends i allready have helps more than would ever be able to be put in words due to my lack of vocabulary skills and the ineffectiveness of words in general, those of you on that list should know who you are, and even though these are just words, know that I will be forever greatful for your help, support and friendship and I am forever in your debt.
And just in case you think I'm hanging up my glooves forever, I'll be back someday, but it'll be a while, so if you have stock in Miller, Jack Daniels, Guinness or Bass, you may consider selling
terporarily unwild bill