wichcraft66

i have come to understand something that i understood a long time ago and am only just now coming back to. my life is simply made up of a series of missed oppertunities. why the sudden change? well to be honest it's not that sudden, ike i said i have known this for quite sometime and am only bringing it up because it seems quite proper to. not that anyone cares. i've just hadd a pretty shitty year and it's only the second month. tonight i was talked down to by an excitable anime punk because he did sports in high school and i slacked off. now there are many things wrong with this picture: 1: the sports he played were swimming and cross country. 2: he likes anime (and thinks the world whould be a better lace if it were like one of the cartoons) 3: the "boy" is a lifeguard (i'm sorry if that offends anyone here but i highly doubt it) that's the job you get when you're sixteen, not when you're almost 21. it all goes back to my complete lack of intrest in this town, county, state, time zone. this might make a few of the other members happy but the other day i could not find a reason to stay in CT. when i told this to some people, they would try to come up with them for me, yet i could find holes in all of them. so i ask, what's the point? (true my piss poor job has screwed me to the point where i don't have enough for a move) but tha's not the point. i think my main problem is that, while i'm looking for that fix to all of this, i'm afraid that i'm trying too hard and will destroy (or have prior) something real. (please note, that this is written while i am in a lot of pain mixed with various pain killers due to a fucked up knee-nothing serious-) quick update progress with CD girl: 0 progress with the minority of the female population (becuse the majority are mre than likely off someplace hating me for onecthing or another):0. God i suck