whodovoodoowedo

I honestly hate not being in control of what is going to happen in the next month or so... Something that I want really really badly is hanging in the air and I have very little control over whether or not I get it. I'm being bounced back and forth both sides fighting for me, one side I really really want, the other side thinking they are doing me a favor by fighting for me. I have told the one side to back off and let it go, I will be back but let me go and do what it is I willingly want to do. I'm not like the other 70% that dont want to go. But said side does not want to let me go because I am apparently part of the foundation of the unit and am said to be an important part of keeping things together. thats nice and all but its not like I'm leaving for good. If I go away for this short period of time I will come back with greater knowledge and be able to perform at an even greater level. FUCK I'm soo frustrated right now my stress meter is maxed and is starting to spill into my depression