whiteiris

I had a really fucked up dream last night. I dreamt that I wewnt up to the bar before Cameron and Lindsey got there to get some food to go and see some friends. I ended up being there long enough for Cameron to get there. I was outside talking to some people and he walked up behind me and wrapped his arms around me and said he was so sorry for being such an asshole and for hurting me and he didn't know what he was doing. He said he wanted to be with me but had some stuff in his life to sort out. So we went inside and I decided to stay and eat. He said he would do anything for me and i told him to fire Lindsey. She got to work later and tried to apologize to me and I told her she was the nastiest skank I had ever encountered and didn't even deserve to breathe air and she disgusted me and to get out of my fucking face. She kept trying to talk to me and I told her I don't give a fuck what you have to say get the fuck away from me.

Then I ended up leaving and walking over to Bossier in the rain to a pet store. I walked back - stopping for a swim in a nearby pool - and got back to the bar. Cameron was still there.I didn't really say much to him except for him to fire Lindsey. I remember in my dream feeling pleased with his grovelling and wanting to use that against him.

I use to have dreams about him all the time. It's been a while. That's part of the reason why I don't sleep. It's like the life I am really living is the dream and the dreams are what is real.

I will update about this weekend later. I just needed to get this out.