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whiteiris

The Black Hole

Member Since 2004

Followers 25 Following 15

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Monday Feb 21, 2005

Feb 21, 2005
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We broke up. That's it. He broke his promise to me and I let myself believe him. There are no words to describe the unimaginable pain I feel right now. I haven't eaten in two days and can't bring myself to stomach anything.

I have this big empty space inside. It is not supposed to be this way. When you give all of yourself and give it your best and do everything you are supposed to then things should work. Life is full of disappointment and hurt.

It hurts worse because I believed him. The thing is that I know he loves me That makes it harder. We can't even be friends because it would hurt too much. That's the worst part - I just lost my best friend.

I am going by tonight to give him his stuff - which consists of a shirt and get my stuff. Which the only thing I can think of is my slippers and a toothbrush.

I feel so alone. And now I get to put on a pretty face so I can go to work. At least I know that I gave it my best - but when you do that and things still don't work - it makes you think your best is not good enough.

I might not go by there tonight. I don't think i can - All I will do is cry. Maybe some other day this week. He has destroyed me. But the good way to look at it I suppose is now I get to build myself back up. But he should have never broken me down in the first place.

YOU FUCKING PROMISED!

I think also a part of the reason I cannot be his friend is because he broke his promise to me. I don't need friends like that. But it is so unfair that I have put up with so much for so long and now when things are going to be going right for him - finally - he ditches me.

I really feel as if he is my other half. I never felt that way about anyone else before. I know he will regret it as does he. By the time he realizes that he made a mistake - it will be too late.

TWO AND A HALF FUCKING YEARS - WASTED.

FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU.

Okay - first hurt then anger. I can deal with anger more than I can hurt. But I am angry because I am hurt. I hate you for hurting me when you promised you wouldn't. I wish this would disappear.
cellobas:
when people promise not to hurt someone...that promise is empty......its imposible to promise not to hurt someone....hurt is a feeling .......sometimes you can't prevent that ......but then again who am i ?....i don't know the situation........chin up
Feb 21, 2005
artrob:
it will. it surely will.
Feb 21, 2005

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