Work was okay last night. I got my tax money in and now feel as I have a safety net now. Not much of one but something. My laptop should be in next week. The harnesses for Itchy and Scratchy should be in next week also. Cameron's CD player for his car should be in next week also. I finally got my deposit back from my previous apartment so now I can give it back to them in the form of a pet deposit. Same company owns the complexes.
I have a list of things I need to do for my Ed Tech class. I need my jump drive back from Cameron.
Speaking of I have not seen or spoken to my boyfriend since Thursday night. And even then I only saw him for about 5 minutes. He brought my cake back to me on his way to work. I really have not spent much time with him all week. I guess it doesn't bother him much. Oh well.
I saw Lindsey last night. She same up to eat with Bam Bam, his brother and Katie. It was nice to be able to sit down. Sometimes when we are slow I will walk around the restaurant looking for people I know so I can sit down.
I know - lazy.
I have lost weight - finally. I hope now it will continue to fall off at a rapid pace. I know that I really didn't have a choice - I could not do anything for close to 6 weeks but it was my choice to eat all those damn Klondike bars. I have been back at work for over a month now and I have managed to not eat the freebies - dead food and the like. Will power is an amazing thing.
I tried taking pictures yesterday but I am going to have to do some maneuvering to try and get the angles I want. The pictures were good, lighting and such but the angles were all wrong.
Valentine's Day is coming up. I have to work. Which is okay but I have to watch people being all sweet and lovey dovey and be reminded that I use to have that. I woke up this morning and realized what I wouldn't give to find roses on my windshield. I hate roses but it is what they would mean. I raced to the window - hoping - hoping - but alas - nothing. Yet again - oh well.
I hope they got all the paperwork signed and such. Or will be signed Monday. Or whatever the fuck it is they have to get done. I never know since he never really tells me. I have to ask Grimace or April. But if everything has been done then I am happy for them all.
You know - my entire life I have been excluded. I am not complaining or being whiny just stating a fact. I never really belonged to a group of friends. I knew everyone but didn't really belong. It is much the same at work. And college. And now even my relationships with men. It seems that it is just the three of them - well I will even throw Lindsey in there since there is now a dessert named after her on the menu. Again - not bitching just stating fact. I have been excluded from a lot of things recently. Like I don't even count. I guess that goes along with the whole feeling as if I don't exist. I never really felt like I had to belong but when it is constantly being thrown up in your face that people don't want you around or that you are being bothersome you kinda wonder why you even try. Especially by the people you love. So - that makes me all the more determined to do what I want to anyway and not give a shit. If I am not appreciated then FUCK YOU!!!!!
My mom and I are going to have lunch next week. She told me that she likes to spend time with me becasue she rarely ever gets to see me for longer than an hour. I like her when she is like that. Like she really is my mom.
I am getting sick. I think that makes me sad all the more. I think everyone get sad when they get sick. Especially when they don't have anyone to take care of them. It is sad. Someone should always have someone there to take care of them when they are sick. Chicken soup and orange juice does amazing things.
I now need to go fold the enormous mountain of clothes that have been sitting on my bed for over a week. I don't mind washing clothes but I hate folding those bastards and putting them up.
I have a list of things I need to do for my Ed Tech class. I need my jump drive back from Cameron.
Speaking of I have not seen or spoken to my boyfriend since Thursday night. And even then I only saw him for about 5 minutes. He brought my cake back to me on his way to work. I really have not spent much time with him all week. I guess it doesn't bother him much. Oh well.
I saw Lindsey last night. She same up to eat with Bam Bam, his brother and Katie. It was nice to be able to sit down. Sometimes when we are slow I will walk around the restaurant looking for people I know so I can sit down.
I know - lazy.
I have lost weight - finally. I hope now it will continue to fall off at a rapid pace. I know that I really didn't have a choice - I could not do anything for close to 6 weeks but it was my choice to eat all those damn Klondike bars. I have been back at work for over a month now and I have managed to not eat the freebies - dead food and the like. Will power is an amazing thing.
I tried taking pictures yesterday but I am going to have to do some maneuvering to try and get the angles I want. The pictures were good, lighting and such but the angles were all wrong.
Valentine's Day is coming up. I have to work. Which is okay but I have to watch people being all sweet and lovey dovey and be reminded that I use to have that. I woke up this morning and realized what I wouldn't give to find roses on my windshield. I hate roses but it is what they would mean. I raced to the window - hoping - hoping - but alas - nothing. Yet again - oh well.
I hope they got all the paperwork signed and such. Or will be signed Monday. Or whatever the fuck it is they have to get done. I never know since he never really tells me. I have to ask Grimace or April. But if everything has been done then I am happy for them all.
You know - my entire life I have been excluded. I am not complaining or being whiny just stating a fact. I never really belonged to a group of friends. I knew everyone but didn't really belong. It is much the same at work. And college. And now even my relationships with men. It seems that it is just the three of them - well I will even throw Lindsey in there since there is now a dessert named after her on the menu. Again - not bitching just stating fact. I have been excluded from a lot of things recently. Like I don't even count. I guess that goes along with the whole feeling as if I don't exist. I never really felt like I had to belong but when it is constantly being thrown up in your face that people don't want you around or that you are being bothersome you kinda wonder why you even try. Especially by the people you love. So - that makes me all the more determined to do what I want to anyway and not give a shit. If I am not appreciated then FUCK YOU!!!!!
My mom and I are going to have lunch next week. She told me that she likes to spend time with me becasue she rarely ever gets to see me for longer than an hour. I like her when she is like that. Like she really is my mom.
I am getting sick. I think that makes me sad all the more. I think everyone get sad when they get sick. Especially when they don't have anyone to take care of them. It is sad. Someone should always have someone there to take care of them when they are sick. Chicken soup and orange juice does amazing things.
I now need to go fold the enormous mountain of clothes that have been sitting on my bed for over a week. I don't mind washing clothes but I hate folding those bastards and putting them up.