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whiskeytiger

Cleveland, OH

Member Since 2007

Followers 32 Following 197

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Wednesday Oct 17, 2007

Oct 17, 2007
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So for some time now, multiple years, i've been battling addictions as I have an addictive personality. when i have a girlfriend i'm addicted to her and sex, when i don't i turn to alcohol, when i decide that booze isn't helping and i come to my senses, i switch to coffee or caffeine in general, then when i come close to dying from the effects i either go back to hitting the bottle or gambling. Basically, without sex i'm either drunk or high all the time which is going to end up killing me.

A few years back I overdosed on caffeine and had a stroke causing me partial blindness in my left eye (just in my peripheral) so i tend to stay away from that these days so it's pretty much "tell time by the bottle" nowadays. when we don't go out (which is rare) i quietly sip my jack at home, passing out on the couch instead of the floor. I know it's healthy to drink like 1 or 2 drinks a night but i just can't do that anymore, if i have 1 i have 5 or 6 or 7. I know alot of people have bouts with alcoholism when they're my age (and single) but i just don't care anymore. i like drinking, i like the taste, the feeling, even waking up on the floor of the bathroom doesn't bother me anymore. I don't plan on living forever anyways and at least this way I know what's going to kill me. Although if i ever found myself in the mix with a skirt i'd probably curb my appetite a bit, but for now, it works for me. I mean everything that's delicious is bad for you these days, so i say why not enjoy life while you got it. i don't know why i wrote this, i guess it's just cathartic to get things off your chest once in awhile.

However, after all is said and done, it's only alcoholism if you admit you have a problem. and booze isn't a problem for me, it's a solution.

the scene is dead but i'm still restless
an hour or so to last call i guess
i shouldn't even be here much less
drinking myself into excess
but i'm not going home till i'm done
the night is young
i'm blacking out but it's been fun
i'm not going home with no one

- we are scientists-
whiskeyface:

heartattack59 said :
i'm not going home with no one




does that mean you are going home with someone wink


oh and we are scheduled to practice tomorrow but bevis christ said he cant make it so we could use a stand in bass player if that guy that spraypaint knows shows up to play drums<----if you dont know whats going on this whole statement doesnt make sense biggrin skull

Oct 18, 2007
brightredscream:
I have an addictive personality as well - maybe not as bad as what you were describing for yourself...but I can relate.

Take care of you

x x x
Oct 18, 2007

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