whiskeyfightpit

I felt like a million dollars tucked into the asspocket of a sixteen year old girl for most of the day yesterday. The medications were put aside and my old self returned overnight. I'm really glad that I didn't have any withdrawl symptoms. Friday was a really fucking terrible day. I felt like I had taken ten painkillers for the whole day. That sensation lasted the ENTIRE day. If that isn't a warning sign to quit taking anti-depressants...I don't know what is. Whatever was good enough for miserable people one hundred years ago will be good enough for me. As long as that whatever will be some absinthe. Everything was coming up roses until the evening. Then it became "Drink a 3 liter bottle of Heineken and listen to Nick Cave by yourself" sort of night. The night started out fun...with friends at least. But there are some nights when you expect a call from the "more than a friend" person...and don't get it. No matter how often something like that happens, you never get used to it. If I could just get used to that feeling and brush it aside...I think things will be peaches & cream. Maybe after a couple of days of no Wellbutrin, I'll have something silly to report. Today is SLEEP DEPRIVED HEINEKEN BOY day. Oh, I drank another six pack of Heineken after I finished the 3 liter bottle. It was like a fucking battleship artillery shell filled with fucking ale. And I polished the fucking thing like it was nobody's business.

they call me the TROOPER!!!

YOU TAKE MY LIFE, BUT I'LL TAKE YOURS TOO!!!
YOU FIRE A MUSKET BUT I'LL RUN YOU THROUGH!!!

Oh, I bought a ridiculous and unhealthy amount of new music yesterday. Man, it made me happy to do that. Here are the cds that I bought:

Marianne Faithful w/ THE VIENNA RADIO SYMPHONY directed by Dennis Russell Davies- Kurt Weill's The Seven Deadly Sins
Leonard Cohen- Death Of A Ladies Man
Modern Lovers- Modern Lovers
Marlene Deitrich- Falling In Love Again
The The- Blue Sky Burning
British Sea Power- Decline Of British Sea Power
Modest Mouse- Good News For People Who Love Bad News
Tom Waits- One From The Heart
Electric Light Orchestra- Face The Music
The The- Soul Mining
Diamanda Galas- La Serpenta Canta
Electric Light Orchestra- Out Of The Blue
Spoon- Love Ways
Van Dyke Parks- Song Cycle

Being good doesn't pay off. Don't follow that path. It goes nowhere.

SOUNDTRACK OF THE DAY
NICK CAVE "MERCY"

and it pushed me to my knees.