So here I am, another night in Tampa. Well the same thoughts are on my mind as last night so....
So what do you believe in? What really moves you passionately....that you would fight for if it was ever taken away?
For me its what I do for a living. I help build roller-coasters. My particular job is the safety and control systems for them...so for me, its like bringing them to life. Each one has its own personality. And there's nothing like the end of a job, opening weekend standing at the exit and watching everyone enjoy something you made work. For those 3 monutes people are on your ride, they aren't thinking of problems or issues or other life shit. Instead its about just letting go and having fun. Its why I love parks, and its why I could never imagine working in any other industry.
Its also one major reason Anne means so much to me. She shares the same feelings on me as it. Obviously that isn't the only reason I'm still around, but it does matter. Its so hard when you know you are passionate about something that not many others even ever think about.
I keep hoping things will turn out. I mean it seems like her and I are good at least. But she's still torn on why she met this other guy so much like her and what does that mean. Makes me feel like the outsider....yanno the longshot on all of this. Ugh been thought about to death, and of course no one seems to know what to say. No I don't blame people, but life can just be frustrating.
But really where I'm at is what if things don't work out. I keep hoping and hanging in here but ya just don't know. Like I said before, its hard enough finding someone who shares my same odd passion (and its unfortunately a must for me). I know I need someone who also wants to work in this bizarre industry. And what's even harder is finding someone who actually could understand me :-P.
Life has been wierd. Its as if I've been watching a movie of it or through a window. Tends to happen to me when things have gotten too static and I need something to change. Unfortunately in this case I know the situation and what needs to change. But this time I can't change it. I can't force the issue....know what would happen and I can't walk away. Sure I could do both but I would be stuck with always wondering and I just don't want to live with that. I also am passionate....I can't just squash emotions like this. There's no one else either. So really what else can I do? Sometimes I guess you just gotta hang out with what fate has thrown you, and wait for the full story to unfold.
Ok, I'll admit this one, for all I've done and been through, I am seriously afraid of getting crushed here. And I am in the position to have that happen. Its not why I'm holding on or anything like that, but for someone who never lets fear stop him in anything, I am deathly afraid of this one.
Ok, so that said, back to that whole passion thing, what you do believe in and why? I'd just like to hear what moves others....who out there has a real passion?
So what do you believe in? What really moves you passionately....that you would fight for if it was ever taken away?
For me its what I do for a living. I help build roller-coasters. My particular job is the safety and control systems for them...so for me, its like bringing them to life. Each one has its own personality. And there's nothing like the end of a job, opening weekend standing at the exit and watching everyone enjoy something you made work. For those 3 monutes people are on your ride, they aren't thinking of problems or issues or other life shit. Instead its about just letting go and having fun. Its why I love parks, and its why I could never imagine working in any other industry.
Its also one major reason Anne means so much to me. She shares the same feelings on me as it. Obviously that isn't the only reason I'm still around, but it does matter. Its so hard when you know you are passionate about something that not many others even ever think about.
I keep hoping things will turn out. I mean it seems like her and I are good at least. But she's still torn on why she met this other guy so much like her and what does that mean. Makes me feel like the outsider....yanno the longshot on all of this. Ugh been thought about to death, and of course no one seems to know what to say. No I don't blame people, but life can just be frustrating.
But really where I'm at is what if things don't work out. I keep hoping and hanging in here but ya just don't know. Like I said before, its hard enough finding someone who shares my same odd passion (and its unfortunately a must for me). I know I need someone who also wants to work in this bizarre industry. And what's even harder is finding someone who actually could understand me :-P.
Life has been wierd. Its as if I've been watching a movie of it or through a window. Tends to happen to me when things have gotten too static and I need something to change. Unfortunately in this case I know the situation and what needs to change. But this time I can't change it. I can't force the issue....know what would happen and I can't walk away. Sure I could do both but I would be stuck with always wondering and I just don't want to live with that. I also am passionate....I can't just squash emotions like this. There's no one else either. So really what else can I do? Sometimes I guess you just gotta hang out with what fate has thrown you, and wait for the full story to unfold.
Ok, I'll admit this one, for all I've done and been through, I am seriously afraid of getting crushed here. And I am in the position to have that happen. Its not why I'm holding on or anything like that, but for someone who never lets fear stop him in anything, I am deathly afraid of this one.
Ok, so that said, back to that whole passion thing, what you do believe in and why? I'd just like to hear what moves others....who out there has a real passion?