it's all out.
i was standing in the kitchen, back twisted slightly so i could see my back in the mirror in the north bathroom, when my stomach twinged again, reminding me of yesterday, curled up and convulsing on the floor, hating my own sadness while relying upon others to save me from myself from hundreds of miles away.
the tears were fresh on my right cheek, real...
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the tears were fresh on my right cheek, real...
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i am miserable.
lindex:
rememeber the burlap sack -- it could be worse 
but the truth is I have no faith in happiness...
Antimo left the note on my desk, as promised, two names and addresses of places with phone numbers written with no punctuation, ten numbers all in a row, and I stared at the paper, three-and-a-half by five inches and microns thin and, all the while, so fucking heavy.
The truth is I'm scared. I haven't...
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Antimo left the note on my desk, as promised, two names and addresses of places with phone numbers written with no punctuation, ten numbers all in a row, and I stared at the paper, three-and-a-half by five inches and microns thin and, all the while, so fucking heavy.
The truth is I'm scared. I haven't...
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a little bit of emma, a little bit of charles.
i have a lover; after further review, all drugged-out stepsisters were left to rot in their own blissful nothingness. i have a lover, i have a love; i ruined something i shouldn't have, i have a lover, i have a love, i have something; i'm sleeping alone while promises, the innocuous kind, fall to the...
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i have a lover; after further review, all drugged-out stepsisters were left to rot in their own blissful nothingness. i have a lover, i have a love; i ruined something i shouldn't have, i have a lover, i have a love, i have something; i'm sleeping alone while promises, the innocuous kind, fall to the...
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i haven't been kissed, properly kissed, in a while, something like weeks, i know it's two at most but it's still far too long when i feel like this, curious and exploring heart and body. i'm exercising again, soon to slash my food intake, hoping my body will burn the little excess fat i have. it's been a while since i've been skinny, i've grown...
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miloryan:
Getting old.....SHIT!!! 23....I can't even remember 23 or being skinny or in shape.
Ok I remember being skinny and I miss it so. I miss not being able to gain pounds.
Ok I remember being skinny and I miss it so. I miss not being able to gain pounds.
i miss you.
miloryan:
I miss you too!!!
Haha, thanks for stopping by.
How are things going with you?
I'm actually feeling pretty good these days.
I like how the days are getting longer.
Haha, thanks for stopping by.
How are things going with you?
I'm actually feeling pretty good these days.
I like how the days are getting longer.
The Mac Store sold me a lemon of a hard drive and is now asking for forty more dollars to look at what is, to me, obviously a hardware issue.
Monster is a damn fine movie.
I bought a pair of black slip-on Doc Martens for $39.90.
My emotional state is...different, to say the least.
Today, I will listen to ugly guitar music at work....
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Monster is a damn fine movie.
I bought a pair of black slip-on Doc Martens for $39.90.
My emotional state is...different, to say the least.
Today, I will listen to ugly guitar music at work....
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anything:
i love the mac store because i can walk there and play with some of the toys i'm about to get. but something about them rubbed me the wrong way. it feels like a used car dealership, and i've heard several bad tales about them, so i'll stay with ordering direct.
and where did you get the docs? i need to exchange some i got as gifts for some decent ones.
and hooray for ugly guitar music. it took a while to grow on me, but i love it now.
and where did you get the docs? i need to exchange some i got as gifts for some decent ones.
and hooray for ugly guitar music. it took a while to grow on me, but i love it now.
I'm listening to Vincent Gallo's Recordings Of Music For Film currently. I've owned this album for over two years, listening to it only sparingly because, when I find it, I'm usually looking for something else, which is a shame, because its' dark, subtle charm always worms its way into me.
It's one of those strange days in Portland where the sun occasionally wrests control of...
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It's one of those strange days in Portland where the sun occasionally wrests control of...
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i drop samples in layers and spit rhymes outside the context of battles, watching M.C.'s call themselves Masters of Ceremony when really they're just moving cattle, i'm reaching a point where the very word "emcee" sounds like a slave name and it rolls off the tongue like a curse, believe it's a blessing and you'll bounce with me, bounce with me,
and yet even my...
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and yet even my...
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disdain:
i am dead
oldschool:
wordsmith