forgive my rashness, my sentence structure, syntax, and logic are going to fail because i am, ultimately, not thinking, but i was called a misogynist last night and am currently working it out in my head, because when someone makes a concrete statement about me, particularly a person i do not like, i pay attention to it, because i try to come up with the most accurate vision possible of those i dislike so that i may easily justify my dislike.
am i a misogynist? no, no, fuck that; how do i exhibit traits one may readily identify as misogynistic? i'm not asking the questions rhetorically because i don't think they exist; i am asking them because i need to read them, see them on the page as i write them, and then suddenly i am someone else ("are you someone else? 'cause i'm me..." drop it, Tricky...)....
i like sex, or liked it, anyway, i wanted it all the time until recently, but i ultimately like to interact with people who stimulate me on as many levels as possible. if i am initially attracted to someone, a woman, why sugarcoat it, since i am depressingly straight, if i am initially attracted to a woman on a physical level, i will naturally want to pursue the attraction further, but i've never wantonly slept with anyone, and not just because the opportunity hasn't necessarily presented itself, i'm sure it has, but i've never wanted or known to take it, you just have to fucking talk to someone and...
...no, no, that's not what i want to say, that's defensive, and we're thinking dissection here.
i use words meaninglessly to me well aware and apathetic of their meanings to others, i follow my impulses with full foresight but apathy toward the consequences, i'm not a great person, my judgement is flawed, i make too many judgements and i can't separate my emotions from my reality enough.
fuck that.
am i a misogynist? no, no, fuck that; how do i exhibit traits one may readily identify as misogynistic? i'm not asking the questions rhetorically because i don't think they exist; i am asking them because i need to read them, see them on the page as i write them, and then suddenly i am someone else ("are you someone else? 'cause i'm me..." drop it, Tricky...)....
i like sex, or liked it, anyway, i wanted it all the time until recently, but i ultimately like to interact with people who stimulate me on as many levels as possible. if i am initially attracted to someone, a woman, why sugarcoat it, since i am depressingly straight, if i am initially attracted to a woman on a physical level, i will naturally want to pursue the attraction further, but i've never wantonly slept with anyone, and not just because the opportunity hasn't necessarily presented itself, i'm sure it has, but i've never wanted or known to take it, you just have to fucking talk to someone and...
...no, no, that's not what i want to say, that's defensive, and we're thinking dissection here.
i use words meaninglessly to me well aware and apathetic of their meanings to others, i follow my impulses with full foresight but apathy toward the consequences, i'm not a great person, my judgement is flawed, i make too many judgements and i can't separate my emotions from my reality enough.
fuck that.